


Why do you act this way?

by Jamespotterismybby



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, James and Lily Potter - Fandom, jily - Fandom
Genre: F/M, Hogwarts, Language, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), No Smut, somewhat mature
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-09
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:14:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 36,323
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27980601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jamespotterismybby/pseuds/Jamespotterismybby
Summary: After Snape calls Lily a Mudblood, James follows her into the castle, and Lily wrecks everything James thought about himself. He realizes he will have to change, not just for Lily to like him but for the good of others around him. We see the changes James makes through their 7th year, maybe more, and Lily's response to seeing him make those changes.  This shows how James and Lily become friends, and then a little more than. Snape is not a main character but an annoying presence throughout. Features all the marauders, and Lily Evans, Marlene Mckinnon, and Alice Prewitt:) Please review! Follow me on Tumblr @// Jamespotterismybby. This is my first fanfic ever written! Thanks for reading!
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black/Marlene McKinnon
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	1. Why do you act this way?

Why do you act this way?

Chapter 1-

Lily sat in the empty corridor, trying her best not to cry over losing her best friend. Her mind whirling in complete shock and oddly stress as if the relief of exams being over hadn’t fully processed in her mind. She should have known Snape agreed with his awful blood purists’ friends. Snape had claimed Lily was different than other muggleborns several times, and Lily always fought the urge to say that no, in fact, she was not different from other muggleborns, she was the same; a human being. She always chose not to acknowledge Snape’s comments like that, as if ignoring it would make his opinion of Muggleborns less true. Right as she was finally starting to process that she and Snape’s friendship was irreplaceably ruined, she heard someone breathing hard, and footsteps rushing towards where she was sitting. She started to get up and tried to figure out where she could hide to avoid the person, she knew it was. “Evans?” She heard the stupid and annoying voice of James Potter call before we came into view before her in the corridor. She turned around and began to walk away hoping that for once, just once He would leave her alone. No such luck. James caught up to her and grabbed her shoulder, and she turned around hoping that her fury with him would still come across despite the tears pricking her eyes. James shocked by this new level of frenzied anger and deep level of sadness he had never seen in the pretty red-haired girl, took his hand off her shoulder and took a small step back. He began to apologize,

“Evans, I’m so sorry about Sniv- Snape, he shouldn’t have called you what he did, and I am so sorry- “

“You think I’m just upset because of Snape? He would not have called me that if you hadn’t provoked him! How dare you try to place all the blame on Snape.” As she said this, she knew that at some point Snape would have eventually called her a mudblood, but at least maybe it would have been in passing and she could deal with the situation on her own, without an audience seeing her be betrayed by her best friend.

“Come on, Evans, you know who he hangs out with, it was bound to happen whether I provoked him or not. I say good riddance to the slimy git.” Lily, realizing that he vocalized a piece of her thoughts began to become completely enraged at the fact that he was right. “Just because it would have happened eventually does not mean I don’t have the right to be furious at you for speeding up the process! Honestly, I am so tired of you thinking that you are so much more spectacular than the rest of the population! As I said earlier, Potter, you’re no better!”

“Lily I- “

“No, I don’t care if you would never call me that, why do you act the way you do? You mess with everyone you view beneath you just for the sake of messing with them! Or maybe it makes you feel better about yourself by making others feel worse. But I can’t believe that we are in our fifth year and you still act the way you do. People’s lives are hard enough without you screwing with them for some sick thrill you get out of it! People have problems and things going on outside of Hogwarts, and you picking on them, even as a joke, makes it worse!” She paused hoping that maybe he wouldn’t speak, and she could leave with the last word. She looked at him with rage for a split second and decided to turn her back and leave as fast as she could.

James half-heartedly yelled down the hallway “Evans, if this is about Snape, I won’t pick on him anymore.”

Lily turned right back around realizing that he still did not get it. She pounded her feet on the stone floor, and stopped right in front of him, and in trying to make him understand attempted, but failing miserably to state calmly, “James” She paused for a millisecond to consider that she has never called him that, and decided she hated the way it sounded coming out of her mouth, “it’s not just about Snape! It’s about Me, the first years you pick on just because you can, and the Slytherins you pick on for being put in a house they belong to! Think of someone picking on Remus, or even Sirius, I have heard his family history! Sirius is the first one in his family to not be a Slytherin, but his little brother is a Slytherin like the rest of the Blacks! There has to be family tension for him, and you probably understand it better than anyone in the castle, and if someone picked on him at school not only is his family home, not a safe place, you destroy the safety and relief that Hogwarts can bring for students! Remus told me about his condition, I pieced it together only because of his monthly inability to patrol as a prefect, because “his mother is ill.”

  
James interrupted Lily saying without actually looking at her, “I don’t know what condition you’re talking about Evans.” Lily continued, “He told me you and the other Marauders know about it as well, and my point is if someone picked on him it would add extra stress, harm, and hardship to Remus’s everyday life! If people picked on your friends you would care, because you believe that those close to you are the only ones who matter, and that’s just not true.” Lily took a short breath, but before James could respond she started again, “Why do you insist on treating people so badly when you could help them! You care so deeply for your precious marauders, so I know there is good in you why aren’t you using it! You cannot tell me you don’t remember being homesick as a first-year. And muggleborns, it is so hard to send a letter to a family that does not understand sending a letter by owls! It is so hard to be picked on because of the status of your blood by others your age who will probably grow up to death eaters! James, stop thinking of yourself for once in your stupid. Miserable. life!” Lily took a huge breath in and realized that if this did not get through to James Potter then he was destined to be a selfish imbecile for the rest of his life. Not bothering to keep looking at James' shocked and dejected face, Lily briskly walked back to the portrait hole, through the common room, up to her dormitory so she could finally slump onto her bed, and mourn her childhood friendship ending. While Lily walked to her dorm, James stood in the place Lily had yelled at him and eventually sunk to the floor against the corridor wall, running his hand through his dark brown hair, processing everything that Lily had said. He put his head in his hands, and for the first time cried because he was ashamed that he was not the amazing person he thought himself to be. From this moment on, He vowed to be better, to treat people better, not for Lily’s sake, but people that matter just as much as his beloved Marauders, and others who may be struggling with something he knows nothing about.

The next day, being Friday morning Lily woke up at 7:00 a.m. and began to get dressed, thinking of how normally she would go meet Severus in the hall to go to the great hall. She dressed in her normal white button-down shirt, a red and gold tie, with a plaid red and gold skirt. She took her bright auburn colored hair out of the braids that she puts her hair in every night so that her hair will have loose waves every day and then clipped one side of her hair back with a rainbow clip she had gotten from a muggle store the summer before fifth year. She looked in the mirror and examined her pale freckled face, and normally striking but now droopy from a night full of tossing and turning, emerald-colored eyes. Feeling too tired and worn to bother with any kind of makeup, Lily decided to finally go to breakfast. On her way down to the common room to exit through the portrait hole, she once again, sadly considered that she would no longer be walking to the great hall with Severus, and then she realized that she does not have many friends aside from him. She thought about maybe going back into her dormitory to ask one of her roommates if they would like to walk with her but thought maybe some alone time might be good. She continued down to the great hall, and as she was about to walk into the great hall, she heard someone call her name. “Lily!” Snape desperately called. Severus caught up to Lily and stopped in front of her with pleading eyes said, “I’ve been waiting for you all night Lily, I’m so sorry, I would have never called you that wretched name if it weren’t for Potter and his idiotic friends. Please forgive me Lily and let’s go back to being friends, please.” Lily looked into Severus’s eyes and was very tempted to forgive him just so she could have her friend back. She told herself in her head that a true friend would never have called her such a thing no matter how provoked they were. She looked away from him and walked past him, and began to have tears prick her eyes, mixed with an enormous amount of hurt and indescribable rage. Snape grabbed Lily’s arm to turn her around, and Lily decided that people needed to stop grabbing her to get her to listen to their stupid meaningless apologies. Lily yanked her arm from his grasp and yelled “Don’t touch me Sev- Snape! I do not care how provoked you were! A true best friend would have never called me what you did, and you cannot expect me to believe that you didn’t mean what you said. You believe it of other muggleborns; therefore, you believe it of me!” Lily continued to walk towards the great hall in hopes that he would leave. Surprisingly, she was able to continue her walk peacefully, until she heard Snape screaming a few feet behind her. “Potter this is all your fault. You arrogant, mindless prick! You’ll pay for ruining my friendship with Lily!” Lily turned around to see Snape pointing his wand at Potter against the corridor wall leading into the great hall. Lily expected James to antagonize Snape as he normally does but he surprisingly stated calmly, “Snape, let’s just calm down, let me go, and I’ll leave you alone.” Sirius was standing pointing his wand at Snape, while Peter was cowering behind Remus who had an arm on Sirius trying to keep the peace. Lily thought Potter’s face looked as sleep-deprived as hers and his hair was messier than normal, and Lily scowled at the fact that she could even care about his appearance right now. Potter had his hand in his pocket as if he was waiting for the perfect time to raise his wand at Snape, and Lily from afar yelled “Expelliarmus!” and each of the three boys’ wands flew into Lily’s waiting hand. All three boys’ heads turned towards Lily, and she slowly walked up to all of them adjusting her head to look at each of them individually, willing one of them to protest the fact that she had stolen their wands. Snape spoke up first once Lily was in enough distance for none of them to have to yell. “Lily don’t you see that this is Potters fault! I mean Lily you hate Potter, and I’ve always been your friend. Please Lily forgive me!” Lily did not acknowledge that Snape had spoken and instead handed James and Sirius’s wands to Remus and said, “Remus, as a fellow prefect I trust that you will contain the rest of the marauders' stupidity, and will not give them their wands back until you feel that it is safe for those around you, that they are given their wands back.” Remus nodded his head and grasped the wands from Lily’s hand as Sirius scowled at Lily. “Come on Evans, you don’t have to babysit us, Snivellus started it.” James stated so quietly that Lily almost didn’t hear it, “Padfoot, stop” Lily ignored James comment and spoke directly to Sirius, forcing her voice to have a calm exterior but inside she was fuming, “Your group's little display yesterday proves that you do indeed need someone to watch your behavior.” Sirius was about to retort when Lily finally acknowledged Snape’s presence and said “Snape despite what Potter and his group did to you yesterday, it is no longer a matter of whose fault it is that YOU called me a mudblood’’- at this word Sirius and James flinched- “ I do not want to be friends with someone who thinks so lowly of me and people like me. Leave me alone Snape.” At this Lily shoved Snape’s wand into his chest and ran back to the common room and up to her dormitory. She slammed the dormitory door and sat on her bed with her knees tucked into her chest, having the biggest cry she has had since the incident at the lake. She realized that while it will take getting used to not being friends with her childhood best friend, she refused to regret what she had said to Snape. Snape did not value Lily as his friend, and Lily knew she deserved better, no matter how painful the loss of Severus’s friendship is. In her hurry to get to her bed, she failed to notice that one of her roommates that she was mildly acquainted with was still in the room. As Lily’s tears calmed down, she looked up as a short, pale, blue-eyed, and black-haired girl named Alice Prewett stared back at her with worried eyes and was holding out her hand with something in it. Lily grabbed whatever Alice was trying to hand her, and realized it was a small piece of chocolate. Alice taking Lily’s response as encouragement, tentatively asked “So, um Lily I know we don’t know each other too well, but would you like to have breakfast with me?” Lily looked at the clock on her nightstand and it said 8:15 a.m. and as if on cue Lily’s stomach growled. She gave a shaky small smile towards Alice, began nibbling on the piece of chocolate, and said “Um, yeah, sure, would you mind if we came back and ate it in our dorm?” Alice understandingly nodded as Lily wiped her eyes, and slowly got up to walk towards the great hall for the second time that morning. As they walk down the corridor in comfortable silence, Lily realized that maybe losing an old friend is not the worst thing in the world.

As Lily and Alice walked into the great hall, Lily out of habit looked at Snape’s usual spot at the Slytherin table and found Snape was already looking at her with pleading eyes. Snape seemed as though he was about to get up to approach Lily, then abruptly looked the other direction at his friends as if remembering that among his wanna-be death eater friends, being associated with a muggle-born isn’t acceptable. Lily turned her gaze away from Snape and looked down at the floor as she walked, oblivious that James Potter was looking at her and witnessed the whole exchange with Snape. James continued watching Lily walk to grab some pumpkin juice, bacon, and eggs until he saw a hand waving in front of his face. “Prongs, stop ogling Evans, I know she looks hot” -Sirius, sitting across from James, turned to appreciatively glance at Lily then turned back to James, “but she’s not worth missing out on cooked bacon and eggs mate.” James just looked down at his plate and pushed his eggs and bacon around his plate, completely lost in his thoughts about everything Lily had said until he felt a light hand on his shoulder. He looked beside him to see Remus Lupin, one of the other fellow Marauders with sandy hair and light brown eyes, looking at him with a compassionate expression. “Prongs, just give Lily space and you’ll figure out how to work it out with her.” “Thanks, Moony” James stated appreciatively, and continued to push his breakfast around on his plate, although feeling a little more encouraged. As breakfast continued, James looked around for Lily hoping that maybe she would be alone for him to attempt to effectively apologize for his role in the chaos by the lake yesterday. As James skimmed over the Great Hall, he saw Lily walking a little behind Alice Prewett, towards the exit of the Great Hall, each with a plate of food in one hand, and a goblet of pumpkin juice in the other. He got up from his seat, hoping to catch up to Lily before she had left, but as he was nearing the exit he bumped right into what looked to be a first year, and the small girl clattered onto the floor along with her food. James desperately wanted to continue towards Lily’s disappearing figure and even took two steps before he heard other students laughing at the first-year girl he had knocked over.

**Okay, James, this is what Lily was talking about, putting others before myself, simple enough.**

Despite Lily becoming almost out of sight, James turned back to the first-year girl and cleaned the food off the floor with a smooth “Scourgify” coming from his lips. The little girl stood up and embarrassedly thanked James and proceed to walk away while trying to wipe the food guts from her robes, “Wait! Um, I can clean your robes as well, that is if that’s okay with you um...?” The girl blushed immensely and quietly said “My name is Amy and your James Potter, and uh if you don’t mind cleaning my robes, I’d really appreci-“ Before she could finish her sentence, James had Scourgified away all of the stains on her clothes. James knelt closer to her height, smiled at her, and nicely said “Amy, could I make you another plate? I’m sorry I ran into you, I need to watch where I’m going I guess” he slightly chuckled and ran a hand through his hair as she blushed brighter red. Amy proceeded to insist that he had done enough by cleaning her robes, and she could make her plate. “Okay, well Amy if you ever need some assistance with cleaning again or need help finding a classroom or something let me know. Again, sorry for bumping into you.” The young girl smiled brightly “Thank you James Potter!” she excitedly hugged him, and then just as quickly as she came into contact with him she had let go and skipped away to sit with the friends he supposed she was on her way towards when he bumped into her. James suddenly remembered his reasoning for getting up from his table and looked at the exit of the great hall hoping by some miracle Lily was still there, and as he suspected would happen, she was not.

**That wasn’t so bad, I think I made the embarrassment of dropping her food lessen, so that’s a start, I guess. Ugh, I wish Lily had seen that. No, it doesn’t matter if Lily saw it. That girl, wait, what was her name? oh, Amy! She deserved to not be embarrassed and I bumped into her, so I should’ve been the one to help her. But I would’ve liked for Lily to see that.**

James went back to sit with Peter, Sirius, and Remus so he could finish his breakfast before lessons started. “What was that about Prongs? Why would you get up and leave a perfectly good breakfast? oh wait, lemme guess, Evans?” stated Sirius Black. Sirius was smirking in amusement at James for he knew exactly James’s reason for leaving his breakfast behind. After all, The Marauders had to listen to James moaning and wishful sighing over how pretty, smart, and lovely THE Lily Evans was for over two years. The Marauders were the only ones who saw how the sting of Lily Evans's hatred for James affected him. What the Marauders did not know was that James's slight change in behavior today was spurred on by the same Lily Evans. “That was kind of you to help that first year James, almost Lily Evans like?” Remus Lupin hesitantly asked with a quirked eyebrow. Okay, so maybe they did suspect what had changed his behavior. The next one who spoke was a pudgy blonde headed boy, with big watery blue eyes, named Peter Pettigrew, “yeah James, what’s up with that? You could’ve turned her robes pink instead of cleaning them or something.” Peter looked at Sirius hoping he would approve of the prank he had thought up involving the innocent first year. Sirius, being the blunt man that he is, and being unaware of Peters need for validation from the other boys, stated “Honestly Pete, turning her robes pink is so uncreative, Prongs should’ve turned her hair pink after cleaning her mess, so then she wouldn’t suspect him. Hell, she probably would’ve gone to lessons like that.” Sirius barked a laugh as Remus gave the boys disapproving looks but said nothing and looked to James. James unsure of how the other Marauders would take his newly decided stance on pranks and picking on others thought for a second before saying ‘’She was embarrassed by me pushing her over and knocking her food all over her, I hardly think I should’ve created more embarrassment for her.” Sirius was focused now on tossing cut-up chunks of sausage into Peter's mouth, as Peter attempted and failed to catch any pieces of sausages in his mouth. James decided Sirius seemingly didn’t hear James or felt no need to acknowledge it. Remus, however, gave James an approving look, and silently thought that a very brilliant, and fiery-tempered redhead may have contributed to James' new appreciation of kindness.

XOXOXOXOXO

AHHh this is my first fan fic I have written, I am working on posting the other chapters that I have posted on fanfic.net! Please review, I love constructive criticism!! follow me on tumblr @//jamespotterismybby and let me know your thoughts. LOVE YALL AND PRAYING FOR EVERYONE DURING THIS CRAZY TIME UGH COVID SUCKS

Love,

Mac


	2. Forgiveness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> James considers Lily's words on kindness and tries to become better. He deals with guilt over the part he played in Lily losing one of her friends and seeks forgiveness. Lily becomes closer to the girls in her year and considered maybe she does not need Snape. Marlene and Sirius are cutesie:))

Once Alice and Lily had arrived back into the dorm, they each sat down on the floor in front of their designated beds which happen to be across from one another. Each girl began to swiftly eat their bacon and eggs as it was nearing time for lessons. Lily suddenly realized that going to lessons would not only mean seeing Snape but having James Potter and Severus in the same room as her. The thought made her fearful of how Potions would go as Potter and Snape would both attempt to talk to her. She considered that O.W.L.s were over, and it is the last week of classes.

Do I really need to attend lessons today? It will probably just be content to prepare for next year, so why learn it now when I will just have to learn it again.

Lily was pulled from her thoughts by the sweet voice of Alice saying, “So, Lily I know that nearly half of Hogwarts saw what happened at the lake yesterday, but I just wanted to say that if you need someone to talk to about all of it I’m here.” Normally Lily would have thought Alice’s words intrusive but seeing as Alice was one of the girls Lily was sitting with before the incident, and Alice wasn’t prodding her to talk, just saying that Lily could, Lily appreciated Alice’s gesture. Lily kindly stated, “Thanks Alice, but I think I’m still processing everything that happened you know? Still just trying to get used to it.” Alice finishing chewing up a bite of bacon while considering what Lily had said and responded, “That makes sense Lily, total sense.” Alice looked at Lily’s clock on her nightstand and read 8:50 aloud. “We should probably get going Lily, lessons start at 9” Alice began to stand up and put her plate and goblet in her laundry for the house elves to pick up, while Lily stayed seated. “Actually Alice, I think I’m going to skip classes today.” Alice looked at Lily with shocked and amused eyes, “You, Lily Evans skipping a lesson? I never thought I would see the day!” Lily looked down embarrassedly, “Well, it’s not like we won’t relearn everything next year anyway, I just thought it’d be good to get some distance from Snape and Potter today.” Lily was still facing down, watching her hands sit in her lap. “Well, if you’re skipping lessons, I’m all for it, mind if I skip as well?” “Be my guest.” Lily gave Alice a small smile as she stood up to put her plate and goblet along with Alice’s for the house elves to pick up. After Lily sat her eating utensils down on Alice’s laundry, she considered what she should do since she is skiving off lessons. “So, Alice it’s my first time skiving off lessons, what do people do when there are no lessons to be going to?” Alice’s face was alight with amusement as she considered Lily’s question, “Well, we could go to the Lake and just sit and watch the water, or maybe go to the kitchens and talk to the elves?” Lily thought about her options, and not really desiring to go back to the lake after everything that had happened, decided that an adventure to the kitchens would be the best option. “How about the Kitchens? I have actually never been to the kitchens; do you know how to get there?” Alice gave Lily a look of mischief as she stated “oh sweetie most second years have ventured to the kitchens at one point or another. Of course, I know how to get there! Lily laughed lightly, and stated, “We could bring the house-elves our dishes from breakfast, so they have less to pick up with the laundry?” Alice thought about this for a second, and said, “That’s a great idea Lily, and would you mind if I invite Marlene to come since she has a free period right now?” Lily was not sure if she really wanted a lot of company today but seeing as Alice has been so kind to her today, it wouldn’t hurt to let one of Alice’s closer friends tag along. “Yeah sure, where would she be for us to be able to invite her?” “Honestly, we could check the broom cupboards” Lily snorted at this as both girls grabbed their dirty dishes to bring to the kitchens. Lily considered how often she has heard Marlene speak of all the boys pining after her, and Lily could understand why. Marlene was a tall, slender yet muscular girl with long curly brown hair, ebony-colored skin, and big round doe eyes the color of chocolate. She wore makeup nearly every day, despite not needing it. Lily recalled Marlene smirking and half-jokingly, half-truthfully saying something in the dormitory about how “Makeup is like painting beautiful artwork on your face, and I happen to already be a beautiful work of art, so makeup makes me all the more appealing!” Marlene also happened to be a chaser on the Gryffindor Quidditch team, which obviously upped her popularity among the male population of Hogwarts. Lily and Alice started to walk down the stairs out of their dormitory when they saw Marlene sitting at a table in the common room talking to none other than Sirius Black. Lily thought this peculiar as she could not recall Marlene and Sirius ever interacting outside of quidditch, and apparently, Alice thought the same thing because she turned towards Lily with a face that heavily questioned, “what is that about?” Lily stifled a laugh at the girl’s relatable confusion as they continued to walk towards Marlene and Sirius. “Hey Marls, Sirius,” Alice stated as she stopped in front of Marlene. Marlene had her hand lightly touching Sirius’s hand but pulled it away quickly as she noticed Lily looking at it. “Hey Alice, Hey Lily, what are you up to? I thought you both had potions at this time?” Lily decided to finally speak up, “we do, but we figured since the lesson will just be retaught next year, there’d be no harm in taking a break.” Sirius quirked an eyebrow at Lily and said, “Evans, if I’m not mistaken this is the first time, I’ve seen you skive off a lesson? Why the sudden change of heart over how important lessons are?” Lily began to feel her temper flaring as she impulsively said “If you must know I didn’t want to see you’re arrogant, pigheaded best friend today so much so that I figured skipping a lesson wouldn’t hurt as much as seeing Potter would.” Marlene looked at Sirius with a very obviously uncomfortable expression on her face, and Sirius spoke confidently with a smirk playing at his mouth, “Well Evans, your skipping off lessons was pointless, because the Marauders except for Remus skived off lessons today as well, so you skipped a lesson for nothing.” Alice butted in before Lily could retort and spoke to Marlene saying, “We were wanting to go to the kitchens, since Lily’s never been, and we were wondering since you have a free period Marls if you’d also want to go?” Marlene looked towards Sirius then back at her friends and said “Actually yeah I’d love that, I slept past breakfast and I’m starving. Um, would it be okay if Sirius came with us?” Sirius stood up and began walking towards the staircase that leads to the boys’ dormitory, “Nah, you go without me, I had a big breakfast anyway, I’ll see you later Marls.” And gave a playful wink at the pretty girl as he continued up the stairs. Marlene got up from her table slightly blushing and grabbed her school bag, as Alice humorously said in an overly deep voice “I’ll see you later, MARLS.” and gave Marlene an exaggerated wink that moved nearly every feature on Alice’s face as she is not the best at winking. Marlene rolled her eyes and said, “Can it Prewett, we would hate for Frank to find out about a certain somebody fancying him, now wouldn’t we?” Alice’s cheeks turned Scarlett as she stuttered “I-, I don’t know what you’re talking about Marls.” Lily chuckled at her dormmates, as Marlene turned towards Lily and spoke kindly, “Lily, I’m really sorry about everything that happened at the lake yesterday. I know what good friends you and Snape were. Sirius is just a right dolt sometimes, and so are his friends, I’m so sorry.” Lily waved her hand at the unneeded apology, and said “No worries, it’s allowing me to get to know my other friends better.” Lily said with a small smile, as Alice and Marlene both smiled at her contently. “Off to the kitchens then?” Lily said with a jolt of excitement. As the three girls walked to the kitchens, Lily’s curiosity of the house-elves who made the delicious Hogwarts dinner grew immensely. She had seen a house elf or two coming to pick up laundry from the dormitory, but never sat down and talked to them as she was always going to class when they came to the dorms. She wondered what it would be like to work in a place like Hogwarts and realized she would soon find out!

After they had finished their breakfast, James, Sirius, and Peter left the great hall and headed towards the dormitory, as they had decided last night that there was no point in going to lessons anymore since O.W.Ls were over, and anything they learned they would just be forced to learn again next term. Remus continued to the corridor where the Potions classroom was and bid his friends goodbye. James was lounging on his bed in the dormitory, while Peter was fast asleep on his bed with an obnoxious amount of drool hanging out of his mouth, and Sirius was laying in his bed looking at the latest Quality Quidditch Supplies magazine James had been shipped since he is a monthly subscriber. James grabbed the snitch from his pocket, which he had habitually stuck in his pocket when he was getting ready for breakfast. Instead of immediately tossing it into the air and letting it fly a few feet before successfully grasping it quickly with his refined quidditch reflexes, he just held it in his right-hand staring at it. Sirius abruptly sat up, “Prongs what time is it?” James checked his watch which read 9:03. “It’s 9:03 mate, what’s up?” Sirius looked around for a bottle of cologne which he eventually used to spritz the fragrant on his neck and forearms. “I’m meeting Marls to… uh talk about. quidditch strategy.” He said distractedly as he looked in the mirror with intense grey eyes and ran a comb through his dark black curly hair that came all the way down equal to his jawline. James, sensing that quidditch strategy was not what Sirius was going to talk about with Marlene, asked “Marls? since when is Marlene, Marls to you mate?” Sirius looked at James with a sly smile and James continued looking at Sirius with an inquisitive brow. “Mate, she’s just a friend okay?” “For now,” James mumbled under his breath. “Nah mate she’s different, I don’t want to just snog her in a broom closet… well I mean I wouldn’t mind it but that’s not all I care about with her.” James chuckled as he said, “Mate, I admire you finally considering something more than a short snog, and it seems Marlene may feel the same way?” Sirius barked a laugh as he said “Yeah, I’m lucky she doesn’t think I’m an “Arrogant bullying toe rag" like some peoples true love” James glared at Sirius as Sirius smirked and walked out of the dorm and down the stairs to meet Marlene in the common room. James continued thinking about everything Lily had mentioned yesterday and began wondering why he started hexing first years just for being a little annoying or why he hexed Slytherins when someone like Sirius could’ve easily been placed in Slytherin. What if all Slytherins weren’t as horrible as he so blindly believed them to be? He really could not answer these questions because he had never taken the time to get to know any of the people he bullied and realizing this about himself deeply troubled him.

**Except for Snape, the slimy git, he deserved some of the hexes we’ve thrown his way. How is he so interested in the dark arts, and best friends with someone as good and just as Lily Evans? Why does Lily like him, and vehemently hate me? He provokes me just as much as I provoke him. Except for yesterday. I guess Snape isn’t best friends with Lily after what she said this morning. I cannot believe I ruined one of Lily’s longest friendships, no wonder she hates me. Merlin, Lily was right, I’m no better than Snape.**

James sat up feeling shameful and regretful as he slammed the snitch onto his nightstand then ran a hair through his hair. He decided that he should try to think of ways that he could try to help others in the upcoming years at Hogwarts. He considered that he could tutor younger kids in transfiguration, as he is extremely gifted in the subject. He got out his ink well and quill to begin writing out a list of things he needs to work on to be able to effortlessly care for others.

  1. **Stop hexing innocent people like first years, Slytherins, and others.**
  2. **Talk to Minnie about tutoring younger students in transfiguration.**



**Surely, if I do these things Lily will start to like me. Oh merlin, why did I ask her out yesterday? She just looks so pretty when she is angry, I couldn’t help myself. Her cheeks were all red and her emerald eyes aflame with passion and her hair was flying all around her.**

James turned his attention back to his list to make the butterflies in his stomach subside. James was attempting to think of more ways to better himself when Sirius barged in the dormitory-like a bull in a china shop. “Prongs, I know that you probably want to apologize to Evans about yesterday, even though personally, I think Snivelly had it coming. But Evans, if you can believe it skived off lessons today, claiming that she didn’t want to see you and my guess is Snape as well. Her, Alice, and Marls are going to the kitchens if you want to go talk to her.” James got up, and checked his reflection in the mirror, then ruffled his hair some more, before rummaging around the room. “looking for this?” Sirius said shaking the Marauder’s Map in the air for James to grab. Aside from being one of the Marauders’ most prized creations, the Marauder’s map was also the most useful tool in making the Marauders' pranks and late-night adventures to Hogsmeade successful. It has complex drawings of everywhere at Hogwarts, including secret passages, and shows where everyone in the castle is at all times. More than that, it was something that each Marauder helped create, James drew every detail of every corridor and room of the castle, Remus did the charms work, Sirius made sure the secret passages on the map were accurately portrayed on the map, and Peter supported them and brought them snacks every late-night they worked on it. James throwing on his robes over his white button-down shirt, grabbed the map “Thanks, mate” and opened the dormitory door. Before walking out the door he turned to Sirius, “How did talking about quidditch strategy with Marlene go?” A bright smile formed on Sirius’s face before he forced it to a small smirk and said “um, it went great, really tactful stuff Marls created.” James snorted and went out the door to try to meet up with Lily in the kitchens.

As the three girls entered the kitchen, Lily’s jaw dropped in amazement at all the little house elves moving around the kitchen doing various things like cooking, boiling, and topping loads of treacle tart with little dollops of cream. Alice laughed at Lily’s awestruck expression and a house-elf with bright eyes greeted the girls with a high-pitched voice “Hello Miss Prewett, Miss McKinnon, and miss…?” “My name is Lily Evans and you are?” “Miss Evans, I’m Dinky, you are the pretty girl Mr. Potter talks of, yes?” Marlene and Alice giggled at Lily’s disgusted face when Dinky mentioned James. “Yes, I suppose I am, what has he told you about me?” The house-elf diverted her eyes and blushed, “Oh, Miss, Dinky cant betray the trust of Mr. Potter, she could never tell that Mr. Potter thinks Miss. Evans is the prettiest girl he has ever seen.” Dinky finished her sentence with a surprised “o” shape to her lips before she cupped her hand over her mouth knowing she had said too much. Dinky began to pace in front of the girls as she mumbled “Bad Dinky, bad, don’t break Mr. Potter's trust. Bad, bad Dinky!” She then took a spoon off a kitchen counter nearby and slapped her other hand with the spoon, “Bad Dinky! Bad!” Lily hurried to the elf, “Dinky, its fine, Potter has asked me out a few times before, you didn’t betray his trust.” “Dinky didn’t betray Mr. Potter’s trust?” “of course not!” Dinky gave a relieved sigh then continued, “Well, what can Dinky get for yous today? We have treacle tarts already made if yous want any!” Marlene was the next to speak, “oh treacle tart sounds great Dinky! could I also get some eggs and a goblet of pumpkin juice?” Dinky replied eagerly, “Yes of course Miss. McKinnon, anything for Miss. Evans and Miss. Prewett?” Alice kindly declines any treacle tart as she has already eaten, and Lily thinking that she deserves some dessert, graciously stated, “Dinky, I’d love some treacle tart, thank you so much.” Dinky beamed and went off to get the food the girls had requested, and the girls found a table in the corner to sit at. Lily groaned as they sat down, “I can’t believe Potter talks to the house-elves about me, that’s so weird!” Marlene and Alice giggled at Lily’s expense and Marlene was the first to subside her giggles. “Well, Lily, it’s no secret that he fancies you, he was dumb enough to ask you out yesterday at the lake, and he’s asked you out 3-4 times a year since the third year hasn’t he?” “Ugh don’t remind me, He only thinks he fancies me because I’m something he can’t have. I’m one of the few women that don’t fall at his feet, so of course, he must chase me until he obtains the thing he wants, then he’ll toss me aside for some other thing he wants.” Alice spoke in a hesitant tone, “Maybe now that he has an idea of what you think of him, maybe he’ll finally back off? I mean he’d be an idiot to think he has a chance with someone who prefers a squid over him.” Lily snorted, although Alice seemed entirely serious. “Yeah, hopefully, he will, but speaking of the Marauders, Marlene, did I see you holding hands with THE Sirius Black?” Lily replied this in hopes to change the subject from the Lake incident. Alice leaned in while in a fit of giggles, “Yeah, Marls, who initiated that? Why did you meet up with him anyway?” Lily wiggled her eyebrows at Marlene as blushed and looked thoroughly embarrassed. Marlene let out a short huff of a laugh and stated, “We were just talking about how we both have a lot of people pining for us, just, well, you know, for snogs, and we just could relate to not really wanting that anymore.” “ooOoh” Lily and Alice chorused together as Marlene put her head in her hands embarrassedly. “So, do you think Sirius is pursuing a broom closet escapade with you, or do you think he might actually settle down for a long-term thing?” Alice enquired intrigued and happy for her friend. Marlene thought for a second and then answered, “Honestly, I’m not sure, I don’t think it’s a short broom closet escapade based on the conversation this morning. I think we are just friends right now, but maybe in the future, it could be something more. I’m not even sure if I genuinely like him yet as a person, but he’s fit so I know there’s attraction.” Marlene’s expression was giddy as Lily and Alice looked at each other in a fit of giggles. Marlene, wanting to shift the focus off of her stated knowingly, “So, Alice do you still fancy Frank?” Alice turned tomato red and into a stuttering mess, “I-, I don’t- I mean- “Lily and Marlene openly laughed at their friend’s obvious embarrassment. Lily amused by Alice’s constant denial, “Honestly Alice, he seems to like you as well, I mean he walked you to class a few times this term, and when we went down to the great hall this morning he watched you like a hawk while you got your food!” Alice surprise by this stated, “No, he didn’t! Did he? Do you think he likes me?” Lily and Marlene looked at her curiously as Alice added “Not that I like him of course, I’m just wondering.” “mhmm sure you are!” said Marlene in between a small fit of laughter. Alice wondered aloud to avoid any lull in the conversation, “I wonder what Frank is doing over the summer holiday? I mean, what all the 7th year boys are doing over the summer holiday” she coughed embarrassedly as if trying to amend her mistake of solely wondering about Frank. Marlene spoke up, “Well, Sirius told me he’s going to stay at James’s house the two weeks before school starts, along with the other marauders.” Lily thought about Remus’s condition and hoped that he would be cared for on the full moons he spent away from Hogwarts. Hoping this would divert the other girls' suspicion over her obvious crush stated, “I know James and Sirius are total dolts- no offense Marlene- but they are totally fit, and even Remus is pretty cute in a ragged sleep-deprived way.” Lily made a disgusted face as she said, “Potter’s personality is so awful, it ruins any appeal his physical features might’ve brought to the table.” As if on cue, James Potter walked into the kitchen. Lily straightened her posture, as Alice and Marlene eyed him wearily. Lily muttered under her breath, “speak of the devil.” James strolled up to the table Marlene, Alice, and Lily were sitting at. Lily already on the defense spouted, “What do you want Potter?” James winced at the already apparent anger in her voice, “Evans, I was wondering if I could talk to you for a second?” Alice and Marlene looked at Lily then back at James unsure of his reasoning to want to talk to Lily. “Why? I thought we talked enough yesterday” Lily stated indignantly. James looked at her with pleading eyes, “Lily, please it won’t take long.” Lily sighed and began to get up and Potter began to walk towards the kitchen exit. Lily leaned in and whispered to Alice and Marlene, “If I’m not back in five minutes come get me, I don’t feel like arguing with him today.” The two girls nodded their heads vigorously as Lily followed Potter out into the Corridor. Lily stopped a few feet away from Potter with her arms crossed over her chest. “Well, spit it out, I haven’t got all day.” James ran a hand through his hair as Lily huffed a breath in annoyance and James immediately took his hand out of his hair. James looked Lily directly in her eyes, ignoring the racing of his heart, and the flips his stomach was doing in reaction to being in her presence. “Lily, I just wanted to say that I’ve thought a lot about everything you said yesterday, and I’m really going to try to be better. And I am genuinely sorry about the part I played in yesterday’s events, you did not deserve that kind of betrayal anyway, but especially for it to occur the way it did, I am so sorry. I tormented Snape unprovoked and I just-I’m really sorry and I hope you can forgive me.” James spoke these words extremely fast, nervous that Lily would not forgive him and would explode at him again. He subconsciously ran an anxious hand through his hair. Lily blinked, completely taken aback by his lack of arrogance, and air of laughter that normally clouded his eyes. Lily desperately wanted to yell at him and continue being furious with him, but she could feel her resolve start to break under the vulnerable and intense gaze his eyes presented. “Well, thank you, Potter, for the apology, and I hope you really did take what I said to heart.” At this Lily turned on her heel and started walking. As she walked, she heard Potter release a deep breath and turned around to look at him, she saw him slumped down against the corridor wall looking at the ground, running a hand through his hair. He looked as though a weight had been lifted off his shoulders, with a hint of sadness in his posture, only confirming Lily’s thought that he really was genuine in what he had said. She almost considered going back to him to say that she did forgive him, but she thought better of it and continued back to the kitchens.

XOXOXOXO

UGH, I wish Lily had said she forgave him, If only I had the power to change that 1!1!1! kidding, kidding, thank you for reading!! please review!! send me prompts at my tumblr- jamespotterismybby

Love,

Mac


	3. Everything is not as it seems

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is the end of their 5th year, and the marauders and Lily Evans are returning home for the summer break. James overhears some things, Lily deals with Snape being a nuisance, and Sirius has some home trouble. TRIGGER WARNING FOR IMPLIED CHILD ABUSE. please review!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please be aware of the implied child abuse. TRIGGER WARNING FOR IMPLIED CHILD ABUSE. 
> 
> but on a different note, I meant to publish more chapters than this today, but I am exhausted with exams and everything. SO, I'll try to post some more by the end of the week. Please review and let me know your thoughts! Send to your friends! thanks for reading !!:)) follow me on Tumblr at Jamespotterismybby.

Lily was trying to decide whether to wear her white button-down shirt with a red and gold plaid skirt and tie under her robes or to wear a black muggle band t-shirt that said Led Zeppelin on it with some muggle jeans shorts and black Chuck Taylor converse on the Hogwarts express. She eventually decided to wear her robes, and then change on the train so when her parents picked her up from the station, so she wouldn’t be given weird looks in the muggle world. It was the beginning of the third week of June, and therefore the day to board the Hogwarts express and leave Hogwarts for the summer break. Lily was very conflicted by how to feel about returning to her little house near Spinner’s End in Cokeworth. On one hand, she missed her family greatly and genuinely wanted to see them. On the other, she would be more in danger of having to talk to Snape, considering that he lives in the same neighborhood as her, and she could not use magic outside of Hogwarts. Plus, it’s not as if her parents are aware of her estranged relationship with Snape. Her mother would more than likely invite him over for dinner or something without any knowledge of how uncomfortable that would make Lily.

I guess I’ll have to tell them we are no longer friends before something like that happens.

Lily finished putting the last of her clothes into her suitcase and began to carry her bags, down the dormitory stairs into the common room. Looking for someone she knew to talk to, Lily looked around the common room. She spotted Alice and Frank sitting on the couch in front of the fire talking surrounded by a few suitcases. She saw Marlene, Sirius, James, and Peter sitting at a table where it looked as though Marlene was the only one who had her suitcase with her and ready to go. Remus was sitting near the table the other Marauders were situated at but was reading a book with his trunk sitting beside him. Scared of interrupting Frank and Alice’s conversation, and desperately not wanting to be near James, she decided to sit down by Remus. Maybe she could continue reading Pride and Prejudice, a muggle classic by Jane Austen she had started a few weeks ago but because O.W.L exams were so stressful and crammed with studying that she had no time for leisure reading. As she walked closer to Remus, she saw that he was reading a book called the Collective works of William Shakespeare, in other words, a book full of muggle classics that she knew. She half-way hoped she could sit by Remus silently and read her book, but also wanted to talk to Remus about the book he was reading. Deciding to leave it up to Remus whether they talked, she sat down beside him and gently pulled out Pride and Prejudice.

Remus seemingly also intrigued by Lily’s choice of book eyed her copy of Pride and Prejudice curiously. “Which part of Pride and Prejudice are you at Lily?”

Lily smiled, glad to be engaged in an interesting conversation said, “Um, I think last time I read it, it was the ball where Elizabeth and Darcy first meet, and she overhears him insulting her.”

Remus laughed and said, “That’s such a funny part at how resentful Elizabeth immediately feels about him because of that incident.”

Lily smiled brightly and said “Yes, I see a lot of myself in Elizabeth Bennet! Her desire for knowledge, and her stubbornness, I just admire her so much. So, which work of Shakespeare are you reading?”

Remus couldn’t help but think of how much Lily really did resemble Elizabeth Bennet, and how much James resembled Mr. Darcy. James was a spoiled rich boy, with just as much Pride as he had money. Of course, Remus wouldn’t dare point this out to Lily. He hoped, however, for James' sake that in the end, their love story would resemble Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth Bennett's love story. Or, that Lily and James could at least both let go of their stubborn pride to become friends. Just like Elizabeth, and Mr. Darcy, Lily, and James are remarkably similar, but neither really knew that yet.

Remus looked down at his book as he said, “Right now, A Midsummers Night’s Dream.”

Lily recalled her mum reading A Midsummers Night’s Dream to her as a child, and how fascinated she was with the magic and fairies. She smiled contently as she considered how impressed her younger self would be if she could see herself now, being a witch and attending an enchanted magical school. “My mum used to read A Midsummers Night’s Dream to me when I was little, is this your first time to read it?”

Remus and Lily’s conversation about classic literature continued on their walk out of the common room to the carriages to board the Hogwarts express. Lily was still talking to Remus while she was waiting in line to get into a carriage. Alice and Frank were lined up in front of her, and Sirius, Marlene, Peter, and James were in a cluster in line behind her. At this point, Lily and Remus’s conversation shifted to what the other was planning to do for the summer holiday.

Lily after stating that she really had no other plans than to relax at her house with her parents when they weren’t working, politely asked “what are your plans for the summer holidays?”

Remus thought for a second before replying, “Well, aside from spending the majority of it with my family as well, I’ll be going to James’s house for the two weeks before school starts.”

Lily must have subconsciously made a face of disgust at the mention of Potter, as this was just something of a habit for Lily, to associate Potter with disdain. Remus laughed as he kindly said, “He’s really not that bad Lily. He makes impulsive decisions sometimes, but he’s done so much for me.”

Lily thought over what Remus had said, as finally, a carriage had reached them, She gathered her trunk and pushed it onto the carriage and sat down on the far left of one side of the carriage as Remus filed in next to her, and James Potter filing in next to Remus. Sirius filed in the seat across from Lily, as Marlene sat by Sirius, and Peter filed in by Marlene.

Marlene finally noticing Lily’s presence address Lily, “glad to see you finally got packed Lily, thought you were gonna miss the train you were taking so long!”

Lily playfully rolled her eyes as she stated, “I was mostly packed pretty early Marls, I was trying to decide whether to wear my muggle clothes on the train or my robes.” Marlene gave Lily a skeptical look as she said “Okay Lils whatever you say” as she playfully rolled her eyes the same way Lily had.

was the next one to address Lily as he said, “So, Lilyflower what are your plans for the summer holiday?”

“Black don’t call me Lilyflower, you’re the last person I’d let have a pet name for me.”

Sirius smirked as he cheekily said, “Nah, I bet Prongs here is dead last on that list, Lilyflower.” Lily looked annoyedly at Potter as if Sirius’s comment was his fault, as she noticed Potter glaring at Sirius with a slight blush on his cheeks.

Marlene moved on as if not noticing the awkward tension looked at Lily as said, “Lily if you aren’t busy during the last two weeks of summer, Sirius and I were talking about Me coming to visit him at James’s house, would you want to come with me so I won’t be the only female there?”

James' ears perked up at this as he watched Lily out of the corner of his eye hoping she would say yes. Lily, not wanting to give a definitive answer, but not wanting to disappoint Marlene, stated, “Um, I’ll have to see what my parents have planned for us to do. We are pretty busy this summer.” Marlene smiled happily as if that was a good enough answer.

Remus eyed her in a way that plainly said, “You just told me you have nothing this summer.” Lily gave him a begging look as if to say, “Do not say anything about it please.” Remus smirked in response, and Lily wondered if each Marauder had their own signature smirk, or if they all picked it up from watching Potter do it.

James suddenly turned to Lily and said, “So, Lily were you pleased with your O.W.L results?”

Lily looked at him weirded out by the fact that he wasn’t flirting with her, or asking her out simply replied “Um, Yeah.” Sirius sniggered at her short reply, and James looked at the ground awkwardly, his right leg shaking anxiously, Lily couldn’t help but notice.

Why is he so anxious?

Lily felt bad over her short reply and is hoping to make James less anxious, so she hesitantly stated, “were you please with your results?” James looked at her hopeful as he said, “Actually yes, I got four O’s and one E, so I’m pleased.”

That’s one more O than me! How could that happen? He barely studied! Of course, Potter puts in nearly no effort and does better than me.

Lily knew she was irrationally cross with him, but not wanting to get in an argument that she knew she would lose, she shortly said, “Well good for you.”

The carriage finally arrived in Hogsmeade and the students began boarding the Hogwarts Express. Lily continued onto the train and began looking for a compartment, as she saw Alice and Frank get into a compartment and decided she wanted to catch up with Alice before not being able to see her during the summer, so she followed them into the compartment. Marlene and Sirius were also walking behind Lily, and panicked Lily looked back at James, Remus, and Peter. She desperately hoped that Potter would not come into the same compartment. Lily walked into the compartment as Marlene followed behind her, but Sirius stopped at the door.

“Sirius, you can join our compartment if you want?”

Sirius was leaning on the doorframe of their compartment as he cheekily said, “Actually Marls, the marauders have official Marauder business we have to attend to in a different compartment. But I’ll come by if you miss me too much?”

Marlene rolled her eyes and said, “Yeah whatever, hotshot go discuss your official “Marauder” business.”

Marlene pushed him off the doorframe, as Lily leaned over to make sure the rest of the Marauders attended to their “business”. Lily saw James, Remus, Peter, and then Sirius pile into the compartment next to them.

Lily let out a relieved sigh as she heard Alice say, “How was that carriage ride with James?”

Marlene snorted as she said “Lily made sure to only say what? Two words to him?”

Alice smiled and slightly laughed at such a classic Lily thing to do in James Potter's presence. Lily defensively said, “I said more than two words to him!”

Marlene laughed as she said, “Oh sure because four words are so different!” Frank laughed at knowing how nervous his dormmate got in the fiery redhead's presence.

Lily laughing slightly said, “Oh no, not you two Frank! I assure you I was perfectly polite to Potter.”

Frank smiled as he looked at Alice, as Alice said, “Sure you were Lily, I’m surprised you didn’t yell at him!”

Lily was offended at this, “I don’t always yell at him!” The whole compartment laughed at Lily’s expense. “Whatever you all are the worst!” Lily decided that she should defend herself for not truly being perfectly polite stated, “Besides after what he has done to me this term, I don’t see why I have to be overly nice to him.”

Alice looked at Lily with a reasoning look, “Okay, but he did apologize for what happened at the Lake Lily, and he seems to be trying to change his behavior. That proves he genuinely feels bad about what happened.”

As if trying to back up Alice’s claim Frank said, “Yeah, James even stopped to help clean off a first-year he had knocked to the ground the other day during breakfast, which is something I’ve never seen him do before.”

Lily was very annoyed that her friends thought James deserved the benefit of the doubt, so she hotly stated, much louder than she intended “Whatever, it’s not just the lake, he has asked me out multiple times every year since third year, and despite every time I have turned him down, he keeps doing it. He’s just doing it as a joke, it’s so stupid! He doesn’t even actually like me! If he needs a girl to boost his ego, he should just go snog someone and be done.” Lily said crossly as she crossed her arms over her chest.

Marlene spoke next, “Maybe he genuinely likes you, but plays it off as a joke to make rejection not sting as much?”

Lily rolled her eyes, “Well, it doesn’t matter if he really likes me or not, I don’t like him and I never will, so he needs to give up.”

At this, Alice, Marlene, and Frank all exchanged awkward glances. Lily feeling the tension gently stated, “So, what are everyone’s holiday plans?” At this, they began to discuss Alice’s parents taking her to France for the holiday, and Marlene’s possible visit to Sirius. All the while Lily could not stop thinking about whether Potter had really helped that first year.

J/L J/L J/L Perspective switch- James’s perspective from the common room all the way to being on the Hogwarts express J/L J/L J/L

James, Sirius, Peter, and Marlene were all standing in a cluster talking in the common room. James was only half listening as Sirius and Marlene discussed Marlene visiting his house once Sirius and the other Marauders came to stay with him the last two weeks of summer. James hadn’t packed yet but figured he could just use magic to pack everything quickly once it was time to head to the carriage. He began to look around the common room, for nothing, in particular, he just suddenly felt very bored at the prospect of leaving Hogwarts and having nothing to do during the summer. Of course, the Marauders had always been good at entertaining themselves, so James knew his summer would be full of some sort of last-minute fun, but he was still bored for not knowing exactly what kind of fun. Out of the c corner of his eye, he saw a dot of red moving around, and as he realized who it was his head snapped to look at Lily.

**Maybe she’ll come over here because Marlene is here.**

He saw Lily looking around the common room as if looking for someone to talk to and immediately turned his head to seem inconspicuous but could still see her in his peripheral vision.

**Come talk to me, come talk to me, come talk to me!!!**

James thought for a second that she was coming towards him when she slightly turned off-center to where he was, and James saw her sit down beside Remus.

**Why would she sit by Remus? I know they are prefects together but are they closer than I gave them credit for? Maybe I can hear what they are saying if I pay close attention.**

James tuned his ears to listen intently to what Lily and Remus were talking about, and he found that they were talking about childhood dreams or being prideful or something. He noticed they both had books in their hands for part of the time they were speaking.

**Maybe they are muggle books or something? Remus is a half-blood, that makes sense.**

James heard desperately wanted to understand what they were talking about and considered walking over there to talk, but he knew Lily wouldn’t like that.

**Ugh. Why can’t I just talk to her like a normal person? I always ask her out whenever I plan to talk normally, but I get so distracted by how pretty she is. If she would’ve gone out with me, maybe I’d have that nervousness out of my system, and I’d be able to just talk and get to know her better.**

James ran a hand through his hair, as students began getting up from their seats in the common room, and James looked at Sirius and said, “Time to go pack, Mate.”

Sirius looked at Peter and nodded his head towards the boy’s dormitory and they began to walk towards their dorm. Sirius looked at Marlene, “I’ll be back in a sec Marls, gotta go pack.” Marlene looked incredulously at him, surprised that he hadn’t packed yet. Sirius laughed and said, “Wait up for me, will you?” Marlene shook her head with the same incredulous look.

As the boys walked into their dorm and began levitating stuff into their trunks, James was still thinking of how much he wished he could just talk to Lily like a normal human being, and not some love-struck puppy.

Sirius clapped James on the back and said, “Let’s go Prongs.”

James heaved a sigh as him, Sirius, and Peter were walking down the stairs he noticed that Marlene was in fact, waiting for Sirius and that Remus and Lily were still talking on their way out of the portrait hole. James felt oddly jealous, not that he didn’t trust moony, he knew moony didn’t feel that way for Evans, but what if Evans felt that way towards Remus, and that’s the real reason she turned him down? James ran a hand through his hair as he said allowed to no one in particular, “Since when are Moony and Evans so close?”

Sirius laughed and said, “They are just friends’ mate.”

James glared at him as he said, “Well, you and Marlene are “just friends” Padfoot.”

Sirius looked at James with a bored expression, “Honestly Prongs, you know Moony would never do anything with Evans, he knows you’re nearly in love with her. Just ride it out, maybe his friendship with her is an opening for you.”

James pulled at his hair anxiously as he considered this and realized that they were suddenly within earshot of Marlene. He hoped she didn’t hear any of that, or if she did that, she wouldn’t tell Lily.

Sirius looked at Marlene’s impatient foot-tapping and said, “I wasn’t gone that long, I’m sure people are just now getting on the carriages, we’ll be fine.” Marlene rolled her eyes and turned on her heel to walk out of the portrait hole. Sirius jogged a few feet to catch up with her as James and Peter trailed behind them.

James wanted to stop thinking of Lily and Remus for the time being, so he looked at Peter. “So, Pete what are your plans for the summer besides coming to my house?”

Peter looked at James with a smile as he said, “I’m not real sure, my mum has her annual trip to Spain, so I don’t know what I’ll do while she is gone.” Peter thought of the joy of getting to spend time away from his mum in the summer. Hogwarts was his year-round haven from his mum, and he missed it dearly in the summer months. Sure, his mum provides him with his basic needs, but other than that he could go without her nagging of what a failure he is. Peter remembered his dad complaining that Peter needed to lose some weight as a child before his dad left them, or his mum asking why he was not getting better marks at Hogwarts. Peter suddenly felt ashamed, he really tried to do well in school, it’s just nothing comes naturally to him as they do for Sirius and James, and he was perfectly fine with his weight. Peter shook these thoughts from his head.

James looked at Peter and said “Well, if you are having trouble finding stuff to do, then you can always come to visit me earlier than the two weeks. Don’t forget we are going to Remus’s a few weekends to help take care of his furry little problem.” James whispered the last part to Peter with a purposeful look.

Peter acknowledged the last part with a nod of his head, then stated, “Alright, thanks Prongs, I might take you up on that.” Peter smiled at his friend as they continued their walk to the carriages.

As the boys plus Marlene neared the carriages, James noticed Lily and Remus still talking and his stomach ached.

**She has talked to him longer today than she has talked to me throughout our whole Hogwarts experience. Honestly, am I that repulsive to her?**

James, Sirius, Peter, and Marlene had got up to where they were standing in a cluster behind Lily and Remus, and James was desperately trying to listen to their conversation. James frustratingly ran a hand through his hair as he scooted just a few steps closer to them, as he heard Lily say, “what are your plans for the summer holidays?”

Then James heard Remus say, “Well, aside from spending the majority of it with my family as well, I’ll be going to James’s house for the two weeks before school starts.” James' heart sped up as he hoped Lily would mention him, but sadly she did not. Plus, he could not see her face, only the back of her head, so he could not see her reaction.

Suddenly his ears perked up as he heard Remus say, “He’s really not that bad Lily. He makes impulsive decisions sometimes, but he’s done so much for me.” James suddenly felt guilty as he thought of what Sirius had said about Remus’s friendship with Lily being an opening for his own relationship with Lily. He should have expected Remus to look out for him.

James saw Lily and Remus began to get into a carriage and decided he wanted to sit as near to Lily as he could so that he could try to have a real conversation with her, and maybe learn something new about her before not being able to see her for a few months. James loaded his trunk and sat next to Remus who sat next to Lily. Then James saw Sirius sit across from Lily and was annoyed that he had not considered that across from her might be a closer seat for talking. James decided to sit and see how the conversation played out in the carriage before he tried to talk directly to Lily.

James turned his head to Marlene as Marlene finally noticing Lily’s presence addressed Lily, “glad to see you finally got packed Lily, thought you were going to miss the train you were taking so long!”

**Okay, so she is a last-minute packer like me, good to know.**

Lily playfully rolled her eyes as she stated, “I was mostly packed pretty early Marls, I was trying to decide whether to wear my muggle clothes on the train or my robes.” Marlene gave Lily a skeptical look as she said “Okay Lils whatever you say” as she playfully rolled her eyes the same way Lily had.

**Merlin, I have never seen her roll her eyes jokingly, I’ve only ever seen them rolled in anger. That was so cute.**

Sirius was the next one to address Lily as he said, “So, Lilyflower what are your plans for the summer holiday?”

**I came up with that pet name for her in fourth year! I was just always too afraid to use it in front of her.**

“Black don’t call me Lilyflower, you’re the last person I’d let have a pet name for me.”

Sirius smirked as he cheekily said, “Nah, I bet Prongs here is dead last on that list, Lilyflower.” Lily looked annoyedly at him as if Sirius’s comment were his fault, as James glared at Sirius with a slight blush on his cheeks.

**I guess it’s good I’ve never called her Lily flower. She’s mad at me that Sirius called her that, and she doesn’t even know I came up with it, imagine if she did know.**

James inwardly shuddered as Marlene moved on as if not noticing the awkward tension, and looked at Lily and said, “Lily if you aren’t busy during the last two weeks of summer, Sirius and I were talking about me coming to visit him at James’s house, would you want to come with me so I won’t be the only female there?”

**Merlin, Yes! I’d love for her to visit.**

James' ears perked up at this as he watched Lily out of the corner of his eye hoping she would say yes. James' heart was fluttering uncontrollably, and he hoped so badly that if she did visit, he could finally get to know the real her, and show her the real him!

“Um, I’ll have to see what my parents have planned for us to do. We are pretty busy this summer.” Marlene smiled happily as if that was a good enough answer, but James suspected that was Lily’s polite way of saying no.

James suddenly saw Remus oddly eyeing Lily, and Lily looking oddly right back at him. Remus suddenly smirked a little bit, and James wanted to know what the exchange between them was about. He desperately wanted to talk to her and did not want to flirt, or ask her out, because he knew that would put her on the defense. He hoped to Merlin that he would not blurt something stupid out.

James suddenly turned to Lily and said, “So, Lily were you pleased with your O.W.L results?” James’s heart for nearly the fifteenth-time today sped up rapidly, waiting to see if she would reply to him nicely or with a random spurt of anger, or if she would just ignore him altogether.

Lily looked at him weirdly in a manner that James couldn’t place, as she simply replied “Um, Yeah.” Sirius sniggered at her short reply, and James looked at the ground awkwardly, his right leg shaking anxiously, Lily couldn’t help but notice.

**Hey, she replied, I guess it could be worse. I wish I could keep the conversation going but what would she think if I kept trying?**

James knew his leg was shaking uncontrollably, and in his robe pocket his hands were itching to run through his hair, but he couldn’t help it, he pathetically wanted to keep talking to her.

**O.W.Ls really? That was so random. Why could I have asked a more in-depth question?**

Lily felt bad over her short reply and is hoping to make James less anxious, she hesitantly stated, “were you please with your results?”

**YES! SHE KEPT IT GOING. Okay be cool but say more than just yes to keep the conversation flowing.**

James looked at her hopeful as he said, “Actually yes, I got four O’s and one E so I’m pleased.” James was genuinely please with his response before he saw Lily’s pursed lips, and creased eyebrows.

**Why does she look annoyed? What did I do?**

James internally winced as she stated her clipped reply of, “Well good for you.”

The carriage had finally arrived in Hogsmeade and it was time to board the Hogwarts. Every year the Marauders sit in the same compartment and talk about possible pranks that they can do the next year, and this year they need to discuss how they will be helping Moony on the full moons during the summer months. James saw Lily go to a compartment, along with Alice, Frank, and Marlene, with Sirius still trailing beside Marlene. James knew he didn’t need to remind Sirius that they have things to discuss, so he waited with Peter, and Remus outside the compartment next to the one Lily and the others had entered. Eventually, Sirius walks towards them and they all file into their compartment. James and Sirius sitting together on a bench on the right, with Remus and Peter on the bench to the left.

Sirius spoke immediately, not wanting to waste too much time so he could go see Marlene again. “Okay, Marauders, first order of business, full moons, Moony, I don’t care what you say, we are coming to your house to help, the question is how do we make sure Moony’s parents don’t find out we were helping him?”

Moony looked around and said, “Really, you guys don’t have to waste your summers to come to help me, I haven’t had help until this year, and I’ve survived. Really, it's fine.”

James sighed annoyedly but with a glint of humor in his eyes, “Honestly, Moony just face it, we are your friends, we accept you, and we want to help you. Besides, it inflates my ego to know I get to secretly run around with a werewolf, just indulge me a little.”

Remus looked at each boy wearily before sighing, “Fine, I’ll admit It’s been less painful in the days after the full moon with all of your help. I’ll just tell my mum you guys are visiting me in the morning after the full moon so that you can spend the night, and she won’t suspect anything in the morning.”

James, Sirus, and Peter beamed, pleased that they could help their friend. Remus looked at each of his friends, as his heart swelled in gratitude.

Sirius spoke next, “Okay, next order of business is next year’s pranks, what are we thinking? I’m thinking we have Peter run on the Slytherins tables again, that was chaotic and hilarious!” Sirius barked a laugh as he thought of all the Slytherins frightened screams.

Peter remembering the amount of Slytherins trying to kill him with a book protested, “No way! I nearly died with all those Slytherins trying to swat me with their textbooks and shooting random spells at me! No, I won’t do it!”

Sirius was about to tell Wormtail to just suck it up and do it, when James said, “ I have actually been thinking we pull back on pranking people this year.”

Sirius turned to James in utter shock, “What?”

James tried to put on a mature and reasoning expression as he said, “It’s just why do we have to mess with people and cause loads of chaos just for a laugh. I’m sure people already have enough chaos with classes, and other things, why don’t we just focus on our schoolwork next year.”

Sirius looked at James with an accusatory expression, “This has nothing to do with focusing on school, and everything to do with Evans! You think that if you change and became more of a stuck-up stick in the mud, that she’ll like you and you shouldn’t have to change for her to like you.”

James rolled his eyes, “It’s not just about Lily, yeah I like her” James paused,

**Possibly love, no wait did I just think that I don’t even know her that well.**

He continued, “but there's no reason why we have to have a laugh at others expense, it's not like making others’ lives more difficult makes ours any better, at least it shouldn’t anyway.”

Remus spoke up, “I agree with James, we should focus on school, especially with it being the year before N.E.W.Ts”

Sirius ignored Remus’s comment because he still believed this had to do with Evans stated, “Prongs, it's not like we are some Slytherins that will grow up and actually hurt people for pleasure, we’re just joking, who cares.” Sirius crossed his arm over his chest, much like a child not getting their way.

James was thoroughly annoyed at Sirius’s inability to understand what he was saying, he ran a hand through his hair, as he said, “We’ll talk about it later, I’m going to go find the trolley, Moony- chocolate frogs, Peter- Pumpkin pasties, Sirius- Bertie Botts?” Every year James bought his friends candies from the trolley on their ride from Hogwarts, as a sort of parting gift, even though he knew he would see them during the summer. He was very well off financially, and even if he wasn’t, he knew his parents would provide for him anything he needed. James knew Remus and Pete are always having to hold back on spending at Hogsmeade, and Sirius’s home life was awful, and he doesn’t have to worry about either of those things, so he thought it fitting that he provide for them as much as he can.

James was walking out of the compartment and was about to pass by the compartment Lily and her friends were in when he heard what sounded like Alice say, “Okay, but he did apologize for what happened at the Lake Lily, and he seems to be trying to change his behavior. That proves he genuinely feels bad about what happened.”

**Are they talking about what happened with Snape at the lake? Is Snape changing his behavior for Lily too?**

James crouched down just on the other side of their compartment door to listen a little longer, he knew he shouldn’t, but he was curious if Lily was planning on going back to her friendship with Snape.

James heard Frank say next, “Yeah, James even stopped to help clean off a first-year he had knocked to the ground the other day during breakfast, which is something I’ve never seen him do before.”

**It's me, they are talking about me. I should leave, I may not want to hear this.**

James was about to get up to leave so he wouldn’t intrude, but then he heard Lily angrily, and loudly state, “Whatever, it’s not just the lake, he has asked me out multiple times every year since third year, and despite every time I have turned him down, he keeps doing it. He’s just doing it as a joke, it’s so stupid! He doesn’t even actually like me! If he needs a girl to boost his ego, he should just go snog someone and be done.”

James' heart was pounding, and he was utterly flabbergasted. He knew he played it off as a joke when he asked her, but he only did that after she would reject him. He genuinely really liked Lily and wanted to get to know her.

Marlene spoke next, “Maybe he genuinely likes you, but plays it off as a joke to make the rejection not sting as much?”

**I knew I liked you, Marlene.**

Sirius walked out of the boy’s compartment looking to try to yell for James to get him some licorice wands as well when he saw James crunched down. James heard him sitting next to him and put his finger to his lips to signal for Sirius to be quiet. The boys leaned in and listened intently.

Lily rolled her eyes, “Well, it doesn’t matter if he really likes me or not, I don’t like him and I never will, so he needs to give up.”

**Oh.**

James' heart shattered and he got up and quickly shuffled back into the Marauders compartment.

Sirius tried to talk to James as he scattered back to the apartment, “Mate- “but the compartment door closed shut in a rush.

James sat on his bench and brought his knees up to his chest as he thought about what he just heard.

He didn’t need Lily as an ego booster, he wants her because she has everything that he wants to have within himself. She is smart, just, brave, sticks up for people in need, and isn’t afraid to be brutally honest with others. He can normally charm his way out of trouble with everyone else, but she calls him out when he’s in the wrong and keeps him accountable. Not to mention the fact that she is completely beautiful, and her eyes, he’s completely enamored by her eyes. Her faint, cute freckles scattered on her nose, and her deep auburn hair that always frames her face in the most elegant of ways. He got butterflies and was deeply horrified at the same time, as all these thoughts of what Lily had just said about him washed through his brain. She thought he didn’t really like her and was just using her to make himself feel good. She said she would never like him, and that he should give up.

**I need to stop asking her out, she doesn’t take me seriously. Plus, she seems adamant she will never like me anyway. Maybe we aren’t meant to be together.**

James ran a hand through his hair as Sirius came in, and comfortingly stated, “Mate, don’t take it personally she knows nothing about you. At all.”

James looked at Sirius with a fake aloofness, as he said “Thanks mate, uh if you want to take some of my galleons to the trolley, feel free, I don’t feel up to it at the moment.” James handed Sirius the galleons as Remus watched James worriedly. Peter seemed partially oblivious to what was going on and got up to walk with Sirius to the trolly. James turned back to looking out the window, as he ran a hand through his hair. Remus wanted to know what had made such a change in James happen but figured it best to let him process it on his own. He suspected it had to do with Lily, as the redhead was not quiet. Remus could hear bits and pieces of her words carrying through the walls. Remus had hoped that she was thinking of what he had told her about James earlier, but it seems that she wasn’t giving it much thought.

It was finally time to get off the Hogwarts Express and for each student to be picked up by their parents to return home for the summer months. James, Remus, Peter, and Sirius all stood in a circle at the platform hugging each other and laughing as each said extremely dramatic goodbyes, knowing they would see each other soon.

“Farewell Prongs, I shall hope to see you soon I bid you adieu,” Sirius said in an overdramatic tone, as he funnily curtseyed to James.

“Farewell Padfoot, I shall hope to never see you again. I bid YOU adieu!” James said jokingly with laughter alight in his hazel eyes, as he curtseyed back to Sirius.

Remus shook his head at his friend’s funny antics as he turned to Peter and said somewhat jokingly with dry humor to his words, “I bid you Adieu Wormtail.”

Peter laughed heartily at seeing Remus’s rare bout of light joking as he said, “I bid you adieu Moony.” Peter and Remus both still laughing hugged each other as Sirius and James realized what was happening.

Sirius, ever the dramatic, loudly yelled, “GROUP HUG” as he jumped on Moony’s back to hug him as James walked behind Peter and each boy was laughing and hugging each other.

As the hug was breaking, Peter said “By the way, Thanks for the sweets Prongs!” as he held up his bag of sweets as if to showcase them. James just smiled as he looked around for a certain gorgeous redhead.

Sirius saw James' gaze searching through the crowds of people. “Forget her Mate, she’s not worth the heartache.”

James’s face held a smile that didn’t reach his eyes as he said, “Are your parents here Padfoot? Or do you need my parents to side-along apparate you there?”

Sirius did not even look around as he said, “They probably picked up Regulus and left, but I can figure out my own way home, I don’t want to inconvenience your parents.” Sirius thought of how mad his parents were that he let blood-traitors side-along him one time at the beginning of fourth year and decided he didn’t want to relive his punishment for that.

James gave him a look that said: “nonsense, it’s not an inconvenience” as Sirius said, “No really, there’s no reason for them to have to take me, I know how to get there walking, or maybe I could fly my broom. I’ll be fine.” James gave Sirius a skeptical look but let it go anyway.

“Alright Mate, well you be careful, and I’ll see you soon.” James hugged Sirius and then went to find his parents. Sirius turned to see that Moony was already with his parents, hugging and smiling, as Peter’s mother was already dragging him away. Sirius went to an area behind a pillar at the platform so no one could see him, and he illegally apparated to the sophisticated house of Black by himself. He had to learn how to do that at the end of his fourth year because his parents no longer helped him get to and from the platform once they had to focus on getting Regulus there, and he wouldn’t dare let the Potters help him again.

Lily, Marlene, Alice, and Frank all grabbed their trunks as they exited the Hogwarts express. Alice and Frank slowly drifted away from Lily and Marlene a tiny bit so that they could talk alone for a second. Lily and Marlene were standing beside one another as Marlene was looking around for Sirius but was unable to find him. She looked disappointed that Sirius hadn’t come to tell her bye, but also understood that he probably was focused on his friends now, or maybe his parents already picked him up. Lily saw Marlene’s disappointed face, and stated, “You can always write him Marls, and maybe you could meet up with him before you go to visit him at Potter’s”

Marlene looked at Lily with happiness, and she gleefully stated, “That’s a great idea Lily, maybe Sirius and I could meet up in Diagon alley or something one day, and that could be our first date type thing!”

Lily quirked her eyebrow as she quizzically said, “Decided that we do like Sirius Black as a person have we?”

Marlene blushed as she said, “Well, I don’t know, but a date would help me figure that out wouldn’t it?”

Lily thought about Marlene’s words for a second as she said, “I don’t know Marls, I feel like you should already know that you like the person before you decide to go on a date with them.”

Marlene thought about what Lily had said, but sighed and said, “I don’t know, I think for me it works better to have a casual meet up where both parties have an idea that there is a mutual interest, even if you decide after that you don’t want it to continue anymore.”

Lily scrunched her nose at this, as she realized that she did not like that idea at all, but unscrunched it before Marlene could see. She guessed the saying, “to each their own” applied to this scenario.

Alice interrupted Lily’s musings as she ran over to Marlene and Lily and squealed. “Frank asked me to write to him over the summer! EEK!” Lily laughed at her friend’s excitement, as she happily stated “Alice that’s wonderful! I’m so happy for you!”

Marlene had a sly expression on her face as she said, “Well, I guess it's obvious that he likes you back Alice.”

Alice blushed as she said, “Well, it's not a date yet, but it's something!”

Marlene gave a dramatic sigh with a hand on her heart. “Ah, she didn’t deny her love of Frank Longbottom! They grow up so fast!” Alice rolled her eyes, and laughingly pulled Lily and Marlene into an exciting group hug. Lily wondered why Potter hadn’t come to bid her an overly flirty goodbye yet, as he normally did. His goodbye often consisted of, “Evans just write to me when you want a date, and I’m all yours love.” Or “Evans, if you miss me too much you can always come to visit me, my parents are away a lot.” Every goodbye consisted of Potter cheekily saying whatever the line was, with an arrogant smirk on his lips. Lily grimaced as she considered these horrid goodbyes, hoping that this year’s goodbye wouldn’t be too annoying.

As the girls pulled out of their hugs and exchanged addresses to write to, and Lily even gave Alice and Marlene her phone number, not that they would use it, but just in case owling wasn’t a fast enough method to reach Lily, as she’d be staying in the muggle world. The girls bid each other goodbye and then went to find their parents. Lily walked around lugging her trunk looking for her parents and looking for Potter trying to avoid him. She felt a familiar tap on her shoulder, and she closed her eyes annoyedly, sighed, and without looking behind she stated, “Honestly, Potter give it a rest.” She was surprised to find that Potter was in fact standing behind her but was holding one of her scarves in his hands. Lily looked down at her trunk to find it partly opened with clothes falling out. Potter handed her the scarf as he said in a voice void of all emotion, “You dropped this.” Lily saw that his hazel eyes were glassed over, void of any laughter, arrogance, anything. Lily grabbed the scarf from his hand, and he was gone just like that.

No goodbye? That’s so strange. But finally! I’ve been waiting for this!

As James walked towards his parents his mind was racing.

**I didn’t tell her goodbye. What if she dies, or I die, and I didn’t tell her goodbye? Neither of us will die, it's fine. Whatever, she told me to give it a rest, so she didn’t want me to talk to her.**

James looked back as Lily reached her parents and hugged them with a large smile on her face. James sighed, ran a hand through his hair, and then turned back around to continue to head towards his parents so he could finally go home.

When Sirius popped outside the door of the sophisticated house of black, he looked at the door and breathed in deeply, then turned the doorknob. He found no one waiting for him at the door, or in the living room. He continued to walk through the house, through the kitchen, down the hallway until he was almost into his bedroom. Then he heard it, a deep female voice that sounds like a waterfall of rocks to his ears. “Look who has returned! It's our blood traitor of a son.” He turned to find his mother, Walburga Black looking at him in disgust. He heard Regulus’s door open and saw Regulus’s head peeking out the door, but Walburga gave him no notice. Sirius braced himself for whatever would happen next, as he said, “It’s uh nice to see you, Mother.”

Walburga turned her gaze to Regulus as she said, “I’ve asked the house elves to have dinner ready for us Reg, by six. Don’t be late.” Walburga turned on her heel as Sirius let out a breath, he didn’t realize he was holding. Sirius went to his room and began unpacking his clothes, and a two-way mirror that James had got him for Christmas this previous year. He ran his thumb over it and laid it on his nightstand. He started thinking about Marlene and realized he was so worried about going home that he forgot to tell her good-bye. He sat down at the mahogany-colored desk in his room, and got out a pen, a piece of paper, and started writing a letter to Marlene.

Dear Marls,

I am sorry I didn’t tell you good-bye after getting off the train. I was just a little preoccupied with my parents trying to take me home, that it just slipped my mind. Would you want to meet up in Diagon Alley sometime before I go to James’s? No pressure, write me back when you can.

P.S. Don’t miss me too much Marls!

-Sirius aka the man of your dreams

Sirius smiled for a second as he sealed up the envelope, but just as he was about to get up to give the letter to his tawny owl, which was sitting on his stand by his window, Regulus came into his room. “Mum’s not going to like you sending letters to that blood-traitor girl”

A grimace appeared on Sirius’s face as he turned to Regulus, the tiny, black-haired, silver eyes second-year boy whom he loved dearly. It was obvious to total strangers that Sirius and Regulus were related, and both belonged to the “Honorable” house of Black. He was horrified that Regulus seemed to really believe the blood purist crap that his parents believed.

“Reg, she’s just a person, a wizard-like the rest of us. Who cares if she doesn’t hate muggle-borns as Mum and Dad do? Honestly, how can they hate people they don’t even know?”

Regulus had no expression, only a glassy-eyed look about his, but the rest of him was stoic. “Don’t let mum hear you, Sirius, you know what she’ll do”

Sirius looked back down at his letter to Marlene, and instead of giving it to his owl to send, he stuffed it in his drawer. “Reg, you don’t really believe that crap mum and dad spout about muggle-borns right? I mean, you don’t actually believe that they aren’t as good as wizards as we are, do you?”

Regulus mulled over what Sirius had said and innocently stated, “Well, why would mum and dad say it if it wasn’t true?”

Sirius looked at his brother, unsure of what to say. Regulus is still a child and doesn’t understand the severity of his parent’s views, and the kind of things people who believe what their mum and dad believe, do to muggle-borns.

Sirius looked at Regulus with a soft, adoring look as he said, “Reg, parents are people too. They aren’t always right about everything.” Sirius suddenly looked at the clock above his bedroom door, which read 5:57. “Regulus, we have to head down to dinner before we are late.” Regulus quickly shuffled down to dinner, as Sirius got out of his chair at looked at the desk drawer which still held his letter. Then he turned to his bedroom door and graciously walked out of it to head down to dinner.

James was eating dinner with his mum, Euphemia Potter, and his dad, Fleamont Potter. He felt comfortable in his parent’s presence, and he deeply enjoyed spending time with them. His parents are quite old, and they always have great wisdom to impart to him when he needs their advice. His parents also held a certain child-like wonder in their personalities, something James hoped he had in him. As James and his parents sat enjoying a celebratory feast that the house-elves had made, James watched his parents. His father was holding his mothers’ hand in his right hand and was eating with his left. James knew that his dad was right-handed, but realized his dad was willing to inconvenience himself to hold his mothers’ hand. His mother's thumb rubbed loving circles on his father's hand, as they looked lovingly into each other’s eyes as they ate. James's heart ached. He wanted what his parents have, and he desperately wanted it to be with the fiery redhead that plagued his thoughts. James began thinking of Lily’s eyes and wondered if her passionate emerald-colored eyes would ever look at him with as much adoration as his mothers looked at his father.

Suddenly, James didn’t feel hungry anymore and decided he needed a nice long shower. James scooted back in his chair, as his mother looked at him questioningly, “James, Darling, are you done eating? You barely touched your dinner.”

“Yeah mum, I just have had a long day, kind of want to go get ready, and go to bed.”

“Alright, darling, well give me a hug before you head up.”

James smiled as he got up from his chair and walked around the table to hug his mum still seated in her chair, and then to hug his dad as well. Suddenly, a loud round of thunder rumbled outside, as each Potter turned to look out the humongous large rectangle-shaped windows that look out from the kitchen to the Potters quitch field sized backyard.

“Is supposed to rain tonight Euphemia?” Fleamont Potter curiously asked his wife.

“I don’t know dear, the sky never looked like it would rain today.”

James became very tired as he listened to his parents discuss the possibly worsening weather. He ran a hand through his hair, as he sighed exhaustedly. “Mum, Dad, I’m going to head up to get ready for bed, but I’m glad to be home. I’ve missed you.” James gave his parents a sleepy smile and nod, before turning to exit the kitchen.

As he walked away his mum said, “Goodnight darling, sleep well. Also, I’ll have the house elves make French toast for you in the morning.”

James turned to flash his mum a grateful smile for remembering his favorite breakfast food.

Fleamont suddenly spoke up as he said, “oh, James how are things with the girl you’ve mentioned? Lily, I think you said it was?” Euphemia flashed a smile at her husband because she was just as curious as her husband to know if her son had made progress in getting the girl he talks about every summer to like him.

James looked down at the floor awkwardly, and ran an anxious hand through his hair, “um, fine I guess, she’s taught me a lot this year, but we aren’t any closer than we were.”

James saw Fleamont and Euphemia exchange a glance that he couldn’t place, as he turned back around and walked out of the kitchen through a long white-walled hallway. James walked the familiar walk through the hall leading to his room. James looked at all the moving pictures hung up in the hallway. He smiled nostalgically as he saw a picture of him and his dad when James was about eight, holding a broomstick in his hand. Of course, James has known how to fly since he was around two when his parent bought him a broom that only flew about a foot off the ground. This day when he was eight years old, however, was a day James distinctively remembered. He had flown so high that he was above the towering pine trees in his backyard, and his dad would toss him quaffles from his spot on the ground for James to practice catching and throwing back. Mr. and Mrs. Potter had James when they were older, therefore their health couldn’t also withstand the constant energy James had as a child, but being the tough Aurors they were, they tried their hardest to be as involved in anything James did. James never felt unloved at any time in his childhood, and he appreciated his parent’s efforts to always make sure he felt loved. James had a grateful smile etched on his face as he walked into his room, grabbed the first pair of boxers and pajama pants in his drawer, then walked towards the bathroom across from his bedroom. He turned the water in the shower to a hotter temperature than he normally did, hoping that it would give him some sort of relaxation after all the events of today.

James stayed in the shower for around 20 minutes. He spent the first 11 minutes of the shower just feeling the warm water hit his back, as he thought of the events of the day. He thought of Lily. He thought of how much disdain she holds for him and realized that him asking her out really does just bother her. He always thought, or more so hoped, that even if she rejected him, she was still flattered by his request, but this seemed to not be the case. It was at this moment that James had decided that he is no longer going to ask Lily out. No matter how much he wants to, he refuses to be the guy that annoys Lily constantly anymore. She will never start to see him differently if he does not truly act differently. She won’t ever like him as a person if she just finds him bothersome. James had finished rinsing his Cypress scented shampoo and conditioner out of his hair, as he turned the water off. He dried off and put on his boxers and pajama pants, then ran one of his mum’s light blue towels with a monogrammed cursive “P” on it through his hair. He threw the towel over the shower rod to dry and then headed towards his bedroom. He grabbed the latest quality quidditch supplies magazine out of his desk drawer and flopped on his bed to read through it. He was reading about a new model of broom which would be called the Nimbus 1000 which was expected to come out sometime within the next year as he heard a loud rapping on the Potter front door. James's room was in the hallway closest to the Potters front door, therefore anytime someone knocked, it carried through the large house to James's room. James grabbed his wand, which he had laid on his desk when he came in earlier to drop his trunk off in his room before going to dinner. He bounded out of the room and ran to stand in front of the Potter’s closed front door. Being the impulsive, and brave Gryffindor that he is, he didn’t consider going to alert his parents of the intruder but instead put his wand at the ready as he opened the eggshell white front door. The sight that beheld him was one he could not have expected less. He saw his best mate, Sirius Black, standing soaking wet with an extremely filled bag hung over his shoulder with obvious tear stains on his face.

“Sirius?”


	4. Going Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sirius arrives at his new home, and James learns more about Sirius's home life. Lily deals with Snape trying to get her to give him another chance. WARNING: some child abuse. I repeat, TRIGGER WARNING FOR CHILD ABUSE.   
> This chapter broke my heart to write, but it will get better !! Please review and let me know your thoughts. I do not own any characters in this story, they belong to JKR!

James moved out of the doorway, as he let Sirius walk into the living room.

“Mate, what’s going on? Why aren’t you at home?”  
  


Sirius plopped down on the Potter’s chocolate-colored sofa, in front of the fireplace where a faint fire was still burning. Sirius let his bag flop off his shoulders onto the sofa, and he put his head in his hands. James looked at Sirius worriedly, as he tentatively said, “Sirius what happened? What’d Walburga do now?”

Sirius looked at James with the most heartbreaking of looks on his face. James had never seen the handsome black-haired boy look so dejected, and wild before. Sirius’s grey eyes were watery, making them look almost silvery, and had a look of pure craze and confusion in them as if he were not completely sure where he is or why. Sirius’s face was damp with new tears, and his hair was dripping water droplets all over his shirt, and the Potters couch.

James saw Sirius shiver slightly, and said, “Hold on Mate, let me get you new clothes and I’ll have the house elves make you some tea. Then, we are going to talk about what happened.” James jogged to his room, and grabbed a pair of navy-blue pajama pants, that had little snitches on them, and grabbed a large dark red Gryffindor jumper out of his closet. It had “Gryffindor” stitched in cursive font in the color gold, and it was a gift from his parents in his first year when he got sorted into Gryffindor. He had to enlarge it yearly so it would fit his continually growing, tall, and muscular form. He walked out of his room, with the pants and jumper in hand, and when he entered the living room, he handed the clothes to Sirius who took them from James' hands without looking at him. Sirius was staring blankly into the small surprisingly still-burning fire, James watched Sirius' depressed form for a second, before running to the part at the back of the kitchens where the house elves sleep. He saw that one of the house-elves he was closest with, Ceesy, was lying in bed in the pajama set that he had bought her last Christmas, and it looked like she had either made, or his parents bought her a matching nightcap. The pajama set and nightcap were white and red plaid, with buttons down the front of the nightshirt. He could not bring himself to wake her just to make some tea when he knew he could do it himself.

He walked back into the part of the kitchen where the appliances were and filled a muggle kettle with water, which had been bewitched to heat itself once the water was poured into it. He went and grabbed one of his mother’s teabags out of a little decorative bucket that his mum had stashed all the tea packets in. The bucket was white with little green leaves and flowers painted around it, and it was placed a corner of the kitchen next to their toaster, which they never used, it was more for decoration. He grabbed a tea packet that said, “Sleepy Time Tea” and thought that might suffice for Sirius since it was the middle of the night. He then grabbed one of his favorite mugs from a cabinet in the kitchen, a dark green mug with a broomstick that constantly zoomed around the mug. He brought the kettle, tea packet, and mug into the living room and sat it all on the Potter’s midnight black colored coffee table. James saw that Sirius had changed into the clothes he had given him and went back to his previous position of watching the small fire, which was just tiny embers at this point. James took his wand off the coffee table, which he must have subconsciously put there in the midst of the chaos of Sirius’s arrival, and lit the fire back up a little more so that it might actually make Sirius warm. James watched as the flames from the fire danced across Sirius’s face, and reflected off the gold cursive “Gryffindor” on his jumper.

Sirius suddenly turned to James as if he just realized James had returned. James sat down next to Sirius and started pouring the heated water from the kettle over the tea packet after he had taken it out of its labeled packaging. He tentatively stared back at Sirius’s dejected eyes which were looking at an area away from James eyes, and more towards the wall behind his shoulder.

“Sirius, what happened?”

Sirius looked at James for a second as he recalled the events that transpired from earlier. “It was my mum, my dad, Regulus, and I sitting at dinner.” He took a deep breath, then turned to look at the fire again, but he continued talking. “My parents started talking about how much they hate mudbloods and blood traitors, the usual, and my mum made a remark about how incompetent muggleborns are.” Sirius paused to take another deep breath, and James took this as an opportunity to hand Sirius the warm tea he had been steeping. Sirius took it mindlessly, and then continued, “I mentioned that there is a muggle-born girl who outranks every pureblood in our year, in nearly every subject, so they surely aren’t any more incompetent than us.” James' eyes flashed to the fire as he breathed out “Lily” in realization.

Sirius continued, “Yeah, Evans, and then my mum and dad both got really angry. My dad said that he “Can’t believe that he has a son inferior to a mudblood” and then I said started freaking out because I didn’t mean that I wasn’t a good wizard, just that Lily is an amazing wizard, who is a muggle-born. I thought that my mum might-um then I guess Reg was trying to help so he said, “Sirius is good wizard, that muggle-born girl just works harder than him and James, so she outranks them” and my mum had told me a few years ago, that I needed to stop befriending blood traitors,” James looked at Sirius with an outraged face, but Sirius’s eyes were glued to the fire. “and she stood from her chair, and started yelling about what a disgrace I was, and how I shouldn’t have to work hard to outrank a mudblood, it should come naturally.” Sirius paused to take a sip of tea, but still stared deeply into the fire. “I got so angry at them, and I wanted to say something, anything to spite them, so I got up from my chair and said, “I’m not just friends with blood traitors, I’m dating one. Your opinions are based on pure crap, and until you realize that, you both are more incompetent than a bloody squib!” and I walked out of my chair to go to my room, but as I turned my back-“ Sirius started violently sobbing as he tried to continue, and he dropped his head in his hands. He was still violently sobbing but looked at James and the look in his eyes was as if he was ashamed, “My mum, she-“ a sob broke out then suddenly in a burst of rage, Sirius stood and threw the tea mug at the wall.- “She crucio-ed me! In front of Regulus!” Sirius turned towards James with his back rising and falling rapidly in his seething. Sirius was turned towards James but was staring intently at the wall behind him

James suddenly extremely angry as well stood up and shocked, and furious. “She crucio-ed you? What kind of mother does that to her own child?!”

Sirius looked at the floor with his hands at his sides clenched into fists, as he quietly stated, “That wasn’t the first time, I mean it was the first time in front of Regulus, but-” He paused as he looked at James, whose mouth was hanging open in a mix of shock and anger. Sirius still looking at the floor continued, “She used to do it when I was a kid, she never did it for very long, but whenever I would do something wrong as a child, annoyed her, and when I got sorted into Gryffindor, she’d do it. In my room, in our backyard, in the living room, somehow always wherever Regulus wasn’t so Regulus had never seen it done, and I don’t think she’s done it to Regulus, because, well, he’s their golden child.” Sirius’s hands fidgeted at his sides as he continued, “I could always handle it when I was younger because it never lasted too long. But this time was different-“ Sirius sat down on the couch as if suddenly noticing how tired he really was, “I don’t know how long this time lasted, it felt like years but could’ve only been a few minutes, and it felt like my sanity was about to slip away. Right as it felt like I was about to completely lose my mind, she stopped. I slumped to the floor for a second, then I turned to Regulus, and he was sitting in a corner of our dining room with his hands over his ears, crying.” Sirius suddenly broke out into a soft round of tears, “I guess I had been screaming really loud, so Reg covered his ears.” Sirius shook his head in shame, and sniffled, then put his head in his hands for a second. Then he turned to James, making eye contact with him for the first time since he started relaying the earlier events to James. “and that’s when I ran to my room and started packing to come here. I waited until it was dark to leave so that no one could stop me, and I walked the first few miles as Padfoot, so if anyone saw me, they would not recognize me. Then once I got out of hearing range from my house, I apparated here.” James was looking at Sirius with sympathy and compassion, and silently wondering when Sirus learned to apparate, while Sirius was looking at James with shame, anger, immense hurt. Sirius turned his head back to look at the fire and took a deep breath. James was unsure of what to say, for the time being, so he watched Sirius intently, then Sirius spoke up again, “The worst part is, I went into Regulus’s room before I left, I begged him to come with me, I begged him so that he wouldn’t have to experience what I had, and he said no. He WANTS to stay there, even after he saw what Mum did to me! If my mum goes after Reg, I won’t be there to protect him, he doesn’t want me to protect him.” Sirius for the millionth time this night wiped his tear-stained eyes and almost runny nose. “I want to keep Reg safe, but I can’t- “He sobbed violently again, and looked at James with pleading eyes, “I can’t stay there James, I can’t” Tears were running fast down Sirius’s cheeks. “Can I stay here just for tonight Prongs? and then tomorrow I’ll book a room at the Leaky Cauldron. I’m so sorry James for waking you up and disrupting your house at this hour, and I mean no disrespect to Euphemia and Fleamont, I just-”

“Mate, you can stay here, no need for the Leaky Cauldron, my parents love you, possibly more than they love me- “At this Sirius laughed lightly, although the laugh was still soaked in sadness. “Sirius, I’d love to have your stay here. You’re my brother. Besides, you were going to come to stay here at the end of the summer anyway, it's no harm.” James leaned into hug Sirius, and James felt Sirius tighten his arms around James' back as if pushing out all the tension in his body that had built up over the course of the day. James could feel Sirius’s calloused hands gripping his shirt, and James tightened his hold on Sirius. James loved his brother so much, and he wished he could take the pain of today's events away from his best friend. They were still hugging when Sirius spoke up.

“Prongs?”

“Yeah Padfoot?”

“Sorry I broke your favorite mug.”

James openly laughed for the first time since Sirius’s arrival. They pulled out of their hug, and James grabbed his wand. He summoned the pieces of the mug and magically pieced them together. “Like brand new,” James stated as he turned the mug over in his hands. “Well, Padfoot you need some rest, and so do I. Do you want to sleep in your usual bedroom across from my room?”

“Yeah, that’d be great Prongs.” James stood up to bring the newly repaired mug to the kitchen, and Sirus stood and grabbed his bag off the couch. “And Prongs?”

“Padfoot?”

“Thanks for being there for me. I’m serious.”

James smiled, “You are Sirius.”

Sirius smiled brightly incomprehension of what he said, “Ah, I didn’t even mean to make the joke that time.”

James lightly laughed, and then looked at Sirius sincerely, “I’ll always be there for you Padfoot.”

Sirius nodded his head at James with an appreciative smile, as he turned on his heel to walk to his usual bedroom. He was looking forward to a good night's rest after the day he had. James headed towards the kitchen to put the mug on the counter for the house elves to clean in the morning and then summoned the kettle and tea packaging remains that he had forgotten in the living room, and sat the kettle with the mug on the kitchen table, and threw away the packaging remains. He looked out the same window his parents had looked out when they had been discussing the weather at dinner. He could not imagine going through the things Sirius had gone through tonight. He ran a tired hand through his hair and left the kitchen to crawl into bed and enter a much-needed deep slumber.

Lily’s parents’ car pulled into her drive-thru at her house near Spinner’s End. Petunia had not come with her parents to pick her up from the train station, and Lily was very curious why. She knew her and her sister’s relationship was somewhat strained, but she thought that they still cared for each other despite the fights they had. Lily walked into her house, followed by her Mother, Rose Evans, and her Father, Richard Evans. Lily walked through the kitchen, up the stairs, to her bedroom, where her trunk promptly slumped out of her hand. She put her owl's cage on her dresser and remembered that she had sent herself a letter to arrive at her house in the muggle world so that Archimedes’ cage would not be as heavy to carry. She smiled at her owl’s name, as her eleven-year-old self had thought that naming her owl after the wise owl in her favorite childhood movie, The Sword in the Stone, was just completely brilliant. Lily was extremely tired and decided that a fifteen-minute nap before dinner sounded divine. She walked over to her neatly made bed, which seemed as though it had not been touched since she made it before leaving to return to Hogwarts after Christmas break this year. She lightly grasped the light pink throw pillow that was resting upon her cotton white fluffy bedspread in her right hand. She then had a throw pillow which was a light version of army green color, and she lightly grasped it with her left hand and sat both pillows lightly on her tan carpeted floor, and then pulled her soft bedspread down so that she could slip into her bed. As she laid down into her bedspread, her eyes began to droop a little, and she realized that for some unknown reason she was extremely tired. Maybe it was the stress from this past week's events finally getting to her, so she breathed deeply, and fluttered her eyes shut. She slowly turned on her right side in her bed and drifted off to a peaceful and deep sleep.

Lily was awakened by a light knocking on her bedroom door, and she bewilderedly looked at her alarm clock on her desk that read 7:32 p.m. She had slept for around 2 hours! Lily quickly sat up and opened her door, to stare at her mother’s loving green eyes, that matched her own.

Her mom laughed lightly at Lily as stated, “Lily, you might want to brush your hair before you come down to dinner” Her mom put her hand up to Lily’s hair to try to smooth some of Lily’s fly-aways.

Lily snorted, and humorously said, “I don’t need to look pretty for a dinner with you and dad. You aren’t that special.” Lily cheekily smiled at her mum's playfully glaring eyes.

“Well, then maybe I won’t let you have any of my homemade and delicious dinners. I guess that’s more spaghetti for me.”

Lily’s eyes widened at hearing her favorite dinner meal mentioned, “Mum! You made spaghetti! Yes!” Lily leaned in to hug her mum, as she stepped past her mum to walk down the stairs to the kitchen, as she was walking down the stairs she could see her father standing at their front door, talking to someone. Lily curiously paused on the stairs and leaned forwards so she could see the intruder without being seen. She recognized that greasy black head of hair.

Lily’s mum came up behind her as she said, “Oh, Lily, Severus was wanting to see you as well. I told your father he could invite in for dinner if Severus hadn’t eaten yet.”

Lily’s eyes widened in shock and annoyance. Lily looked at her mum and urgently said, “Mum don’t let dad invite him in, I don’t want to see him.” Lily’s mum looked at her questioningly. “Mum, just please get rid of him then I can explain.” Lily's mum walked past her and went down the stairs, and Lily walked back up to the hallway where her bedroom was to avoid being seen by her former best friend. She could hear her mum saying that Lily was already in bed, which Lily was sure Snape would know was not true, but she could not bring herself to care.

How dare he show up at my house! He knows I do not want to see him, he thought he would be invited in and force me to be around him because my family was unaware of his betrayal! Honestly, how pathetic. 

Lily heard her front door close, and she let out a breath she was not aware she was holding in. She walked down the stairs and began making a mound of noodles and spaghetti sauce that was the size of her head on one of her mother’s grey glass plates. Lily tended to have eyes bigger than her stomach. As Lily sat down, her mum was standing by the table with her hand on her hip. Lily looked at her plate as she dipped her fork into the middle of the mound of noodles and started to twirl to keep the noodles in place on her fork. She avoided her mother's gaze until her mum finally spoke up, “Lily, what is going on with you and Severus?” Lily’s dad was watching her mum and decided that he would let his wife handle this situation, but Lily knew her dad was just as curious about what Snape had done to his beloved daughter.

“Nothing any more mum, we just had a falling out.”

Her mum continued her intense gaze at Lily until Lily gave in, “Okay, he called me a mean name, in front of a bunch of people at school, something he never should’ve called me, and now we aren’t friends.”

  
“What did he call you?”

“Just an insult in the wizarding world, and besides, he doesn’t hang out with the best crowd at school, so I am totally fine no longer being his friend.”

Her mother's gaze softened, “What crowd does he hang out with?”

“Mum it’s not a big deal, just mean students that do bad things. I don’t much care for them.”

Lily hadn’t told her parents about the rise of this evil, prejudiced wizard in the wizarding world, and what his followers were like. She did not fully understand everything herself, so she saw no point in worrying her parents over something that she didn’t fully understand yet. She just figured her mum would assume Severus befriended students who do drugs or something of the sort, and she was okay with her mum assuming that much for the time being.

Lily continued to look at her spaghetti lovingly as she shoved huge mouthfuls into her face, as her mum and dad sat beside each other holding hands at the table. Lily’s father finally spoke up, “How was that Potter fellow you always talked about? Was he any less bothersome this year, sweet pea?”

Lily rolled her eyes at the mention of Potter’s name. “He wasn’t any different, still the arrogant self-conceited pig he has always been.” Lily's parents looked at each other with an unplaceable expression, as if they knew something Lily did not. Lily was uncomfortable in this awkward situation, so she looked down at her plate and went back to her spaghetti.

Her mother and father started conversing in hushed whispers to each other, quietly laughing. She saw her dad push one of her mum’s auburn colored hairs behind her ears. Her mum had red hair the exact shade of Lily’s, and the same eyes as Lily, or rather Lily possessed her mother’s features. Lily watched them bemusedly, as she wondered if she would ever have what her parents had. Lily honestly wasn’t sure how someone could spend years and years loving the same person, without ever being annoyed by them. She figured her parents were just a rarity in the world of romance. She knew that Petunia, the over-dramatic and romantic person that she was, desperately wanted a boyfriend, and wanted a relationship that was as she described “consistent and normal” and Lily inwardly blanched as she thought of this. Maybe it was because Lily was a sort of an oddball in her family, but she did not want anything perfectly plain and normal like Petunia did. She wanted someone as passionate as she was, someone who desired justice in the world, and who deeply cared for others, no matter the cost. She did not particularly care if the bloke was a wizard or a muggle, but she knew what personality attributes she wanted in the bloke. Lily looked down at her plate, as she sadly realized it was empty, she got up to wash it off so she could place it in the dishwasher, as she turned towards her parents to ask where the dish soap was, she saw her mum leaning up to kiss her father on the cheek. A blush lightly tainted the parts of her father’s face where his dark brown, mixed with a grey beard was not covering his skin, but Lily thought that blushing was not something adults did. She associated blushing with embarrassment. What could make her father blush? Was he embarrassed because Lily was in the room? Whatever it was, Lily realized she wanted a man humble enough to blush when Lily showed him affection. Maybe Lily was more romantic than she gave herself credit for.

After Lily had located the dish soap and put her plate in the dishwasher, she bid her parent's goodnight and decided to go up to her room and get ready for bed. When she arrived in her room, she saw her owl, Archimedes, had returned. She walked up to Archimedes and tenderly stroked his feathers, “Hey boy, how was your flight?” Lily very much believed that to some extent animals could recognize certain words that humans spoke, and being from the magical world, Lily had no doubts Archimedes could understand some of the things Lily spoke to him. Hopefully, Archimedes knew Lily cared about him, and that wasn’t just her own personal mail service. Lily remembered that she had written herself a letter, and she forgot what she had written to herself this morning, so it was a nice little surprise to see what she had written. She grabbed the letter from Archimedes’s claw and opened it to a letter that said in her pretty cursive scrawl, “Yay for being home Lily!” Lily snorted as she expected nothing less from herself. She sat the letter on her bedroom desk, and then changed out of her Led Zeppelin t-shirt and her jean shorts and tossed them in her laundry basket. She put on a pair of black running shorts, along with a large plain army green jumper, that she had bought from a small muggle boutique the summer before the fifth year. Often her upper body would get cold when she slept, while her lower half which was always submerged in her warm comforter got overly heated, so she always slept in long sleeve shirts with a comfy pair of shorts. Once she was done changing into her nightclothes, she walked out of her bedroom, across the hall to the bathroom to brush her teeth. When she opened the door, she saw her sister, Petunia standing at the sink brushing her teeth already. “Tuney! I’ve missed you! Why didn’t you come to the station with mum and dad?” Petunia’s eyes glanced at Lily through the bathroom mirror for a split second, then she leaned over the sink and spit a minty glob of toothpaste into the sink. Then Petunia rinsed her brush off under the stream of water coming from the sink and laid it beside the sink. She turned to Lily and said, “I was at Vernon’s house meeting his parents” and then she proceeded to walk past Lily to leave the bathroom.

Lily was confused by Petunia’s somewhat cold demeanor, so she said, “Wait? Vernon? Is he your boyfriend or something?”

Petunia scoffed and rolled her eyes, “Yes, he is my boyfriend or something.”

Lily smiled happy for her sister, but still conflicted by Petunia’s tone stated, “When will we get to meet him?”  
  


Petunia sighed annoyedly as she started walking back to her room “Mum and Dad have already met him.” Petunia made sure to emphasize the “Mum and Dad” part, implying that the only people that matter had already met her probably a boring and plain boyfriend.

Lily was now annoyed at Petunia’s behavior she followed Petunia into the hallway and somewhat loudly stated, “What’s your problem Tuney? I haven’t seen you in months, why aren’t you happy to see me?”

Petunia quickly turned around to look at Lily and cross her arms over her chest, with a fiery look in her plain, pale blue eyes that rivaled Lily’s when she was angry. “Why would I care about you coming back freak? And you are too much of a bizarre freak for Vernon and me, so you won’t be meeting him anytime soon, if at all. Just leave me alone Lily.”

Lily balled her hands up into fists and fiercely yelled, “Well, Fine I don’t even want to meet your vermin of a boyfriend, who is probably so boring I’d fall asleep talking to him if he’s anything like you!” Petunia did not even turn back to retort just kept sassily walking down the hall to her bedroom. Lily stomped back into the bathroom and angrily squirted the white and blue toothpaste onto her pink toothbrush, and forcibly turned the knob for the water to come on.

Once she was done brushing her teeth, she angrily stomped into her room and noticed that there was another owl sitting next to Archimedes. She recognized this owl to be Snape’s, as it was an incredibly old, and battered tawny owl. She rolled her eyes and grabbed the letter from the scraggly owl and scanned her eyes over the messy chicken scratch writing.

Dear Lily,

I know you are still awake because you don’t normally go to sleep until around midnight. I’m sorry for what I did, please forgive me. I will visit every day if I must. We can talk without having to worry about Potter and his cronies intervening. Please, Lily, give me another chance.

Your friend,

Sev

Lily crumbled up the letter and threw it in her trash bin. She really did not want to deal with Snape’s antics this whole summer. She needed to escape. She realized that there was an option, albeit a last resort option, but an option none the less. She searched around in her yet to be unpacked trunk, and found two pieces of parchment, but was too tired to look around for her quill and inkwell. She grabbed a pencil out of a little yellow plastic cup that held all her pens and pencils, and she began to write her first letter.

Dear Marlene,

I think I am going to take you up on that offer to go with you to visit Sirius at the Potters. However, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT leave me alone with Potter and any of the Marauders, minus Remus, at any point. My stress levels could not handle it. Write back to let me know when you plan on visiting the Potter’s house. Also, maybe we could go to Diagon Alley and get ice cream one day soon? We should invite Alice along as well! Hope you arrived home safe Marls.

Sincerely desperate to leave her house,

Lily

She attached the letter to the tie placed on Archimedes claw and told him to bring this the Marlene McKinnon. Archimedes gracefully flew out of Lily’s already open window. Then Lily began writing her second letter of the night.

Snape,

Please stop contacting me and stop coming to my house. We are not friends, and we never will be again.

-Lily

Lily wrapped the letter to Snape's scruffy tawny owl, and as if the owl were anticipating Lily’s letter, it flew out of Lily’s window without any sort of command from Lily. Lily was relieved that she could finally go to sleep, so she placed her yellow pencil back into its rightful bin on her desk and climbed into her bed. She checked the clock and it was approximately 10: 40 p.m. now. She summoned her Pride and Prejudice book from her trunk and decided to read until 11 o'clock, just so she can see what happens after Darcy insulted Elizabeth. However, she promptly fell asleep once she began her reading, and drifted into her dreams with her eyes shut, a book loosely grasped in hand, and breathing deeply.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAHHHh thanks for reading! I have been reading so many other fanfics by other brilliant writers, and while I love it, I get confused between the multi-chapter ones I am reading hahaha. Send me prompts at jamespotterismybby on Tumblr.


	5. He was the awestruck one, really

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lily has a new hairdo and decides to visit the Potter's house with Marlene. James' nerves might get the best of him, but he just wants Lily's visit to go tremendously, yknow? We learn about the first times James asked Lily out, and maybe James isn't completely terrible, but Lily wants to protect herself, after all, she was just betrayed by her oldest friend aka SnApE.

Lily stood in the bathroom of her muggle childhood home after a shower, with a small pair of child scissors in her hand. She has been wanting to change her hair for a while now but could never decide on what she wanted. Up until this moment, she would part her blazing auburn hair down the middle and would braid it at night to make it wavy in the morning, sometimes clipping one side back or even clipping both sides back. She wanted something that still looked like her but made her look more mature like an actual young adult. She had seen a picture in one of Petunias magazines she had left at the kitchen table of a model with straight across bangs and she decided she would try her hand at cutting her the same bangs.

Okay, this is either going to end brilliantly or disastrously but I can just use magic to fix it if it ends badly.

Lily grasped the scissors a little tighter in her hand and took a deep breath. She grabbed a wet tendril of hair from each side of her middle-parted hair. She held them out straight in front of her eyes and then brought the scissors up to an area a little longer than where she wanted the bangs to lay once they were dry. She put the open scissors horizontally across her wet strands of hair and slowly closed them on her hairs and a small “Snip!” sounded as the chopped off hair fell to her bathroom counter. She looked in the mirror and was some-what pleased with how it looked, but she didn’t like the precise line of hair across her forehead. She grabbed little sections of the newly made bangs and held the scissors vertically and snipped randomly on the edges of each section of hair to give her hair less of a perfectly straight edge. Then she took out Petunia’s hot pink hairdryer from the cabinet under the sink, and dried her hair, while lightly brushing her hair now and then as she dried it.

She stared at her new hair in the mirror, pleased at how her hair ended up. She felt very accomplished knowing that she had done this new hairstyle herself and felt oddly more confident as if having a new haircut made her a somewhat different person. She wrapped the hairdryer cord around the hairdryer then stuffed it back in the cabinet under the sink. She then went back to her room to get ready for the day and to pack a few clothes for today's events.

It had been approximately a month and a half since Lily had sent Marlene a letter saying she would like to accompany her to visit Sirius at the Potter’s house at the end of the summer. Only when Marlene sent Lily a letter back, it stated that Sirius had owled Marlene to tell her he had moved into James’s place much sooner than expected, and he would love for Marlene to visit sooner if she wanted to. Thus, Lily would have to visit the Potter’s house sooner than expected, and she had mixed feelings. She was grateful that Marlene is letting her stay at her house each night after they spend the daytime at the Potter’s. Marlene and Lily decided to visit the Potter’s house for three days and then they would spend the two nights at Marlene’s house. Lily was relieved that she would get to have a few more days away from her irritable sister, and more than that, away from Snape

She had received multiple letters from Snape via owl, and he had tried multiple times to come to her house and convince her to come to the park down the road where they first met. Lily knew Snape was desperate because he was trying to play to her sense of nostalgia by convincing her to go to the park, and it just reinforced her determination to not give in and forgive him. Lily was ecstatic to have the opportunity to get some distance from Snape, but she did not want to deal with Potter’s obsessive flirtatious banter. In all honesty, she may have been flattered by Potter’s compliments and requests for a date to Hogsmeade had she thought he meant it, but she knew he was just joking around to make himself feel better. She desperately hoped that Remus would be at the Potter’s because if it is just Sirius and Potter, it would resemble a weird obscure sort of double date, and Lily could not have objected more to experiencing anything resembling a date with James Potter. If Remus is there, she could give Marlene and Sirius alone time, and not be forced to pay attention to Potter.

Lily sighed as she pushed the last of her summer clothes into the small brown and pink daisy suitcase she would be bringing to Marlene’s house. She is bringing a few pairs of muggle jean shorts, an arrangement of muggle band t-shirts, and wide strap primary-colored tank tops. She also packed one pair of white sandals that would match any outfit she brought, along with a white pair of converse, because she was not sure what they would be doing at the Potter’s home. She really hoped that this would go well, despite her expectation of being uncomfortable in Potter’s presence.

Ugh, imagine what Potter’s parents must be like. What kind of people could raise such an arrogant person? Maybe meeting his family will give me some sort of understanding of why Potter acts out the way he does.

Lily was honestly very interested in getting to meet Potter’s family, mainly because she hoped it would give her an idea of how to best handle him when he annoys her.

Lily zipped up her suitcase after shoving her copy of _Pride and Prejudice_ on the mound of clothes, although she expected she would not get to read much. She grabbed her suitcase and started to head down the stairs, but she remembered she had forgotten to pack her toothbrush and toothpaste. She left her suitcase in the hall and then trod back to the bathroom where she had cut her hair earlier, and hurriedly opened the door, but paused as she saw Petunia holding her hairdryer.

“Lily, did you use my hairdryer?”

“Yeah, I had to dry my hair to see what my bangs would look like dry after I cut them!”

“You should have asked Freak! Jeez, you have no respect for other people’s stuff!”

“Petunia, I know how to use a hairdryer, I didn’t break it, I didn’t run it for very long, so it didn’t overheat. I just used it for a few minutes, besides I normally let my hair air dry, I just needed to make sure my bangs looked good.”

Petunia scowled at Lily, “Well, they don’t look good, so it was a wasted effort. Who cuts their own bangs? You should’ve gone to the beauty salon.”

Lily touched her bangs self-consciously as her own anger spiked, “Whatever Tuney, you’re just mad that I can pull them off and you can’t”

Petunia’s face got tomato red with rage, and Lily was surprised steam didn’t come out of her ears, “I could pull them off if they were in style Lily, you aren’t the only pretty one around here! You just-you- Whatever you’re a freak and you know it!” Petunia stormed out of the bathroom with her hairdryer still in her hand and slammed the door in Lily’s face.

Lily blew out an angry puff of air, as she looked in the mirror at her bangs.

I think they look good right? I mean I guess I could straighten them. No, Tuney is not going to make me feel bad about myself.

With this thought, Lily angrily grabbed her toothbrush and toothpaste out of the first drawer of their bathroom and stomped into the hallway. She picked up her suitcase, and rushed down the stairs, she checked her watch and realized that it was 12:11, and Marlene and her parents were supposed to side-along Marlene and Lily to the Potter’s. Lily breathed out as she called out “Bye Mum, Bye Dad, Love You!”  
and she heard Petunia call out from up the stairs, “They’re at work freak!”

Lily rolled her eyes, “Love you too Tuney!”

She walked out the front door, with her suitcase, toothbrush, and toothpaste in hand. She saw Marlene and her parents standing in her driveway. “Marlene!” Marlene turned and smiled brightly at Lily.

“Lils! Oh, it's so good to see you!” The girls embraced in a friendly hug, each with happy smiles on their faces.

As they pulled out of their hug, Lily turned towards Marlene’s parents, “You must be Marlene’s parents, I’m Lily Evans, one of her dormmates.”  
Marlene’s mother, a pretty, tall, slender Ebony skin-colored woman, looking to be in her early forties smiled at Lily, with a smile that resembled Marlene’s, “Nice to meet you, Lily, I’m Donna McKinnon, and this is my husband, Michael McKinnon” Lily turned and shook hands with Marlene’s father, a tall, muscular, also ebony-colored man, who was very attractive Lily couldn’t help notice. No wonder Marlene is so beautiful, both of her parents were what the world would consider attractive.

“Nice to meet you both! So, how will this side-along work?”

Marlene’s father spoke up, “Ah so I will be apparating with Marlene, and you can apparate with Donna. Basically, you just hold on tightly to the person apparating, as if you were hugging them, and we will apparate as normal and we’ll be at the Potter’s mansion shortly!”

Lily turned to Marlene and silently mouthed, “Mansion?” Marlene smiled mischievously and wiggled her eyebrows at her.

Donna spoke up next, “So, is there a place more discreet that we could apparate from Lily?”  
  


Lily thought for a second. “Actually, we could just go in my back yard, my fence should block us from the view of other people.” Lily walked forward towards the orange-brown colored gate that led to her backyard. As she walked to the backyard, she heard some muggle music screaming from Petunia’s room, and she rolled her eyes. She led the McKinnon’s to the middle of her backyard. “So, this spot should be secluded enough.”  
  


Marlene’s father looked around, “What a nice backyard, Lily, your parents have good taste.”

Lily wondered if Marlene’s father really knew what good taste in the muggle was world but decided not to question it. Her parents had pots of really big bushes and flowers places randomly around the yard. They had a padded bench that was attached to the porch by chains that allowed the bench to swing. And really that was it. It really was quite quaint and plain. However, Lily loved getting to set up a tent in the backyard and camp as a child, or to sit on the swing watching the stars.

Marlene drew Lily out of her reverie, “So, can we get going?”

Lily chuckled, “Why so eager to see Sirius Marls?”

Marlene’s eyes widened as she quietly mouthed, “Shut up Lily!”

Lily laughed loudly, “yeah, yeah Marls.”

Marlene hugged her father and closed her eyes, as her father kissed her on the head. “It will be fine Lily, there's nothing to worry about.” Michael had said reassuringly to Lily before Marlene and he apparated with a quick “Pop!”  
  


Lily suddenly had nerves of butterflies in her stomach, “So what happens if one of us gets splinched?”

  
Donna laughed lightly, “Don’t worry about that Lily, I have been apparating a long time it will be fine!”  
Lily lightly wrapped her arms around Marlene’s mother’s navel, and tightly shut her eyes. She heard began to count, “1….2…3!”

Suddenly her head felt really dizzy, and she had a strong tugging sensation in her navel. As quickly as all these motions around her body came, they went. And she kept her eyes shut for a few minutes, tightly hugging Donna, as everything stilled around her. She heard Marlene laughing as she slowly loosened her grip on Marlene's mum and opened her eyes. When she opened her eyes, she saw a huge… well. Mansion. It looked like it was made out of white marble on the outside and had huge white and gold pillars that were holding up the very tall awning over the porch.

“This, is Potter’s house?”

Marlene looked at Lily and wiggled her eyebrows again. “It’s huge right?”

  
Lily's eyes were widened in shock and her mouth slightly open. “No wonder he’s so arrogant!”

Marlene giggled and turned to her father to say goodbye. Lily turned towards Donna, and graciously said, “Thank you so much for letting me side-along you!”

Donna smiled, “No problem Lily, and if you ever need anything owl us, well be happy to help.”

Marlene walked over and hugged her mum, and Lily walked to Marlene’s father and thanked him profusely as well. Marlene walked towards Lily, as Lily saw Marlene’s parents walk towards each other and with a loud “Pop!” they were gone.

Lily was still eyeing the outside of the mansion, as she heard a front door open. “Marls! You made it!” She saw Sirius Black smiling brightly as he stepped out of the front door. Lily and Marlene began walking toward the said front door. Sirius met them halfway and hugged Marlene. Marlene giggled, as Sirius hugged her tightly. Lily noticed James still standing in the doorway of his house, with his hand in his hair. She began slightly disappointed that Remus wasn’t there, but as she thought this, the very Marauder walked out of the door towards Lily. “Lily, you made it!”

Sirius suddenly acknowledging Lily’s presence, stated “Ah, Evans, you came along as well.”

“Yes, I did Black.”

Remus came to hug Lily lightly. “Had any good reads during the summer Lily?”  
  


Lily smiled, “I am actually still reading Pride and Prejudice. I just kept reading Mr. Darcy's proposal scene repeatedly so it’s dragging it out.”

Remus laughed, “That is a great dramatic scene though!”

Lily looked curiously at the doorway again to see James, still standing awkwardly, but this time was standing outside the front door. Marlene noticed Potter and somewhat happily said, “James! How are you? It must’ve been hard to keep this one under control!” She giggled as she pointed at Sirus. James laughed lightly, “It’s been a good summer Marls! Not too much going on, um, the house-elves made lunch if anyone is hungry.”

Lily’s stomach rumbled as he said this. She awkwardly followed behind Remus, who was following behind an attached at the hip Sirius and Marlene. She walked through the front door, as Potter was still holding it. Lily was somewhat surprised that he had waited and held the door open for everyone, and she couldn’t help but notice he was significantly taller than the last time she had seen him.

She gave a curt “Thank you” to James as she walked past the door.

He gave her a nod in acknowledgment, and Lily was shocked that he hadn’t complimented her, flirted, or asked her out. Lily looked at James up and down for a second as he looked at the floor while closing the door he was holding open. He was wearing a black t-shirt that had a golden snitch plated on the front and had a pair of what looked a lot like black muggle basketball shorts, with a gold stripe down each side. She wondered where he would have gotten such pants, and that sort of clothing was not common in the muggle world. She noticed his hair was very messy and even looked somewhat wet as if he had let his hair air dry after his shower that could’ve occurred a few hours ago.

He is insanely tall now, almost even more attractive than last year. Wait, no Lily! you hate him, he is decidedly unattractive.

Suddenly she was brought out of her musings as James walked past her, to the kitchen where she assumed everyone was already eating. Lily felt weird about the fact that he did not flirt with her or even try to talk to her. Why was she somewhat hurt? It was not even that she felt rejected, but she expected him to spout out his usual, “Alright, Evans?” He didn’t so much as make eye contact with her. Peculiar to say the least.

She sighed and walked the same direction Potter had and looked around for the kitchen. She walked into a dining room area, that had large tall windows that looked out to what she assumed the Potter’s enormous backyard. She saw Marlene sitting next to Sirius, who was sitting next to Remus who had an empty seat beside him, and on the other side of the empty seat was James. There was a significant amount of space between James and the empty seat compared to the space between the other chairs. Lily thought this very curious because typically Potter probably would have intentionally sat awfully close to Lily. Lily awkwardly sat down in the empty seat next to Remus and saw that the lunch was a tiny bowl of French onion soup, which was sometimes made by the house-elves at Hogwarts. Beside the bowl of soup, as a sort of side, was a small chocolate frog still in its package. Lily suddenly got a pang in her stomach of missing Hogwarts and was glad that getting to eat this sort of meal was like a small glimpse back into the magical world. Sometimes she felt like she got whiplash from switching to the magical world, then to the muggle world. She felt unsure of which world she belonged to, but she felt it was leaning more towards the wizarding world. Also, aside from the reminder of Hogwarts, she genuinely loved chocolate frogs, so much! It was the first candy she ate in the wizarding world, and she vividly remembered watching the little candy frog hop around the compartment on the Hogwarts express her first day venturing into the wizarding world!

Lily looked uncomfortably around at the people sitting around her, and she heard Marlene, Sirius, and Remus arguing over something, but she was unsure what. As she looked near James' side of the table, she found him staring at her, and she expected him to look away and he didn’t. She scrunches her eyebrows questioningly at him. As if suddenly realizing his stare, she abruptly turned and stared down at his soup. She turned towards Marlene, Sirius, and Remus, and Marlene passionately stated, “Let's ask Lily! Who do you think would win in a duel, Professor Slughorn or Professor Flitwick?”

Lily didn’t think long, “Flitwick of course, Slughorn is amazing at Potions, but that’s not the most helpful thing in a duel, Flitwick’s charms are faster to apply in a duel, and I don’t see Sluggy being the type of wizard to hold a fight long, I see him hiding somewhere or randomly fleeing.”

Marlene looked smug as she turned towards Sirius, as Sirius stated, “Well, what if Sluggy took liquid luck right before the duel, then, of course, he’d win against Flitwick.”

Remus spoke up next, “Of course if he knew the duel was happening, he could do that, but that has nothing to do with his own skill, and how he duels other people when he’s not prepared.”

James spoke up next, “You both make good points, hypothetically, say one side of a battle knew when they would be dueling, everyone on that side could take liquid luck and be successful, but if they are ambushed, then, of course, it comes down to skill, which is more important to have, in the off chance the attack is a surprise.”

Lily mulled over Potter's words in her head and considered that it was honestly intellectual. She was surprised that he would genuinely consider each side, instead of just blindly support whatever Sirius said. 

Marlene spoke up next, “Okay, let's assume that Slughorn and Flitwick have some beef of some sort, maybe they both want to date Mcgonagall, I don’t know”

Sirius had a profoundly serious (Pun intended) look upon his face, as he said, “Sluggy and Flitwick can stand aside, Minnie is mine.” Then he looked around at Remus and James who looked at him for a second, and each boy busted out in loud laughter. 

Marlene rolled her eyes, “Okay fine, Slughorn and Flitwick both know the duel is coming, but solely based on skill who would win? No liquid luck or anything involved.”

Lily spoke up next, “I stand by my previous statement, Flitwick would win.”

James said, “I have to agree with Lily, I think Sluggy would just try to flee or something, or-“ James paused to laugh somewhat with a small smile on his face, “ invite Flitwick to his slug club parties as a peace offering.”

Lily snorted at James’s comment, and then remembered that she hates Potter, so she immediately wiped the smile from her face. James was staring at her bewildered as if he could believe he had made her laugh, and Lily looked down at her half-eaten bowl of soup.

Sirius ignoring the tension, “I don’t know, I mean Sluggy would just need to stun Flitwick because he’s so small he’d fly a hundred feet in the air!”

Marlene playfully slapped Sirius’s arm, “Flitwick is a great wizard though!”

Sirius looked playfully at Marlene for a second then his face returned to his serious expression, “But if he gets thrown across the room, it won't matter he’d probably be injured!”

Lily thought of a question that she genuinely wanted the group's opinion on, “The real question is who would win between Dumbledore and McGonagall?” Lily wiggled her eyebrows in Marlene’s direction, who chorused a low “oOoOo” as Marlene turned towards Sirius.

Sirius spoke first, “I might be biased, but I think Minnie, I think if she wanted to, she could do some real damage.”

James spoke next, “Sure, but Dumbledore seems to know anything and everything before anyone else, he’d anticipate McGonagall’s moves before she even makes them.”

Lily turned towards James as she said, “But McGonagall is an Animagus, surely would be cunning enough to do unpredictably strong spells, I mean the amount of skill it takes to become an Animagus, McGonagall’s probably one of the best wizards at Hogwarts.” Lily expected more speculation from the boys about McGonagall’s Animagus skills, but the boys were glancing back and forth at each other calculatingly. Suddenly Remus spoke up, “Who wants to go play quidditch?”

James was the first to jump up, “I think there are enough brooms for everyone to fly, since there's five of us we could do two on three?”

Sirius spoke up excitedly, “I call Marlene being on my team!”

James thought pensively for a second, “Yeah that’ll work, and then Me, Remus, and Lily can be the team of three?”

He looked towards Remus and Lily for a confirmation, and Lily vigorously shook her head, “No, no way”

Marlene laughed, “Oh yeah, Lily claims to have a deathly fear of heights, she hasn’t flown a broom since the lesson in first year.” Marlene looked at Lily with humor in her eyes.

James looked at her shocked, “What? How could you not have flown since first year?”  
Lily felt self-conscious as everyone in the circle seemed flabbergasted by Marlene’s claim. “I just don’t like flying; it doesn’t come naturally to me like it seemingly does everyone else.”

Remus put his hand on Lily’s shoulder comfortingly, “Don’t worry Lily you don’t have to fly if you don’t want to.”

James looked at Remus betrayed, “No, she’s gotta at least try again, and we can all teach her how to fly.”

Excuse me? I am right here and can speak for myself!

Lily looked at Potter testily, “And what if I don’t want to be taught how to fly Potter?”

Sirius and Marlene looked at each other worriedly, scared that the last hours’ worth of civility would go down the drain.

Lily was still sitting in her chair with her arms crossed over her chest, as James ran a hand through his hair, and then put both hands on his hip as he matter-of-factly stated, “Then you’ll be missing out on something really amazing, Evans.”

There was a pause as Lily looked at James shocked by his revelation, and Sirius and Marlene got up to go outside. Sirius felt uncomfortable in the room, so as he walked outside, he said, “Marls and I will get the brooms ready, we’ll get five brooms in case Evans changes her mind.”

Remus got up uncomfortably as well, “Lily if you don’t want to fly you don’t have to, but James is right, you’ll be missing out.” Then he swiftly slid through the sliding glass door that led to the Potter’s humungous backyard.

Lily was still sitting in her seat with her arms closed over her chest looking at her still half-eaten French onion soup, with an annoyed grimace on her face. James was pacing and running his hand rapidly through his hair and alternating between looking at Lily and the ground.

“Evans, I don’t like this, I don’t like how bad of terms we are on. I don’t like that I am always making you mad.” James tugged anxiously at his curly locks and pushed his glasses up his nose which had fell down his face while he was pacing back and forth.

Lily was confused and somewhat annoyed by James' statement, “Okay? What do you want me to do about it?”

James looked exasperated, “Lily, can we just, start over, can I call you Lily, and you call me James? Can we just be civil to each other?”

Lily tossed his words around in his brain, “Do you mean, be like, friends?”

A wide smile spread across his features, “Yeah, like friends.”

“I don’t know James- “

“See! We’re already doing it, you called me James!”

Lily breathed out deeply as she uncrossed her arms, “Let me think it over for a little bit, okay? There is a lot I have to consider.”

Like how you have driven me crazy for the last five years, and annoyed me, and picked on my former best friend, and hexed random people for fun for years. 

Lily saw James face look hesitantly hopeful as he asked, “Will you at least let me, and the guys teach you how to fly? We won’t let you fall, and we are quite experienced.” James said this with a small cheeky smile, as Lily glared at him thinking over her options. She could go and hang out with her friends while possibly dying from falling off a broom, or she could stay inside and read Pride and Prejudice, which is something she could have done at home. She was going to regret this.

“Fine, I will learn how to fly, but the second I say I want off the broom, I’m getting off!”

James held his hands up in surrender, with a goofy crooked smile on his face. “Of course, Lily, whatever you want.” He then walked towards the sliding glass door and opened it, gesturing for Lily to walk through it first. Lily looked at him skeptically, trying to make sure that he knew no funny business would be tolerated. She looked deep into his giddy hazel eyes with her calculating, glaring green eyes as she walked in front of him out into the back yard. As she walked into the yard, she was awestruck, by not only how big the backyard was, but by how many different sections and parts of the backyard there were to explore. There was a larger portion off to the right which was about the size of a regular quidditch field, and it contained shorter goal posts that were nearly the same as the ones at the Hogwarts quidditch pitch, aside from the height. Then off to the far left, was a large garden that had a bunch of neatly trimmed bushes, large flowering trees, and a large elaborate white marbled fountain that had a large stone unicorn accompanied by a smaller baby unicorn as the centerpiece. The baby unicorn knelt as if it was drinking from the circle of water surrounding it. Placed around the unicorns and the circle of water were a bunch of baby white marble fountains that were lightly spurting up water about a foot into the air, and the water would fall back into the fountain after reaching its maximum height. And then towards the back end of the yard was a large area that resembled the forbidden forest at Hogwarts, but looked much less intimidating, and more so like an area that muggles would consider good camping ground if they knew the area existed. Unbeknownst to Lily, James was standing behind her, watching her eyes shift over his backyard, dazzled by how pretty she could make any emotion, and still giddy that Lily Evans would even consider being his friend. He was the awestruck one, really. 

J/L J/L J/L J/L J/L J/L J/L PERSPECTIVE CHANGE, this is James perspective before Lily gets to his house, and then his perspective once the girls do arrive J/L J/L J/L J/L J/L J/L J/L J/L J/L J/L J/L J/L J/L J/L J/L J/L J/L

James woke up this morning the earliest he had woken up all summer and had gone to bed especially early the night before to ensure that he would look well-rested, despite his early waking at 6:45 a.m. He has spent the summer staying up every night with Sirius, and eventually Remus until about two in the morning, and would sleep until about 12:00 p.m. every day. However, today was an especially important day for James because it was the day his crush, Lily Evans, would be coming to his house to visit, for the first time. He had to ensure that the house was clean, and that lunch would be ready as Lily and Marlene had said they would arrive around lunchtime. James was not sure what specific time that meant so he wanted to be able to tell the house-elves what to make in time so that the meal could be ready by twelve p.m. He had made a list of all the things he needed to do to get the house ready for Lily, which included but not limited to, making lunch(the house-elves would help him as long as he remembered to tell them to cook for that many people), cleaning the bathrooms, cleaning the back porch, and cleaning his bedroom. Usually, James and Sirius did not care about having a mess in their rooms, and the house-elves tended to keep everything for the most part clean, but James wanted everything to be spotless for Lily since he knew Lily liked things clean.

He hopped out of his bed and put on a pair of royal purple pajama pants over his maroon boxers, and tiredly stepped out of his room, and went to knock on Sirius’s door. James knew knocking would not wake Sirius up, as Sirius normally slept late no matter how early he went to sleep. James knows that it’s because of the waking nightmares that occur from living in the “Honorable” house of Black, so Sirius isn’t getting as much sleep as he needs. James knows about the night terrors because Sirius has been screaming in his sleep since he has been staying with James. James himself has been having odd nightmares that he cannot place, it contains an odd flash of green light, a baby’s cry, and then he always wakes up. James always wakes Sirius up when he starts screaming and makes up a reason why he has to talk to Sirius in the middle of the night until each boy forgets their nightmares’ and gets thoroughly tired enough to head back to sleep. After having knocked for about 15 seconds, James turns the doorknob to Sirius’s bedroom and walks in. He made sure Sirius went to bed as early as he did, and surprisingly Sirius only screamed once, so they were both more rested than usual.

James wanting to get started on the chores for today loudly stated, “Padfoot.” Sirius was sleeping in an extremely odd position. He was laying on his stomach with his right arm tucked on the pillow, left leg hanging off the bed and out of the warmth of his comforter, and the other leg bent slightly in the comforter, and his left hand was pulled back rested on his back. “Padfoot!” James stated louder. Still no response from his best mate. “Paddy you leave me no choice.” James sighed and firmly grasped Sirius’s comforter and yanked it off Sirius’s body. Still no response. James then went and grabbed the pillow that Sirius’s head was resting on, and James noticed a large pool of drool coming from his brothers’ mouth. “Ewwww!” James groaned. The tip of his first finger had lightly grazed the pool of spit. He violently wiped the finger off on a dry part of the pillow. Then he grabbed the pillow on an area he knew was dry and pulled with all his might and the pillow flew out from under Sirius’s face. He still was not waking up. “What the hell?” Normally, Sirius would have at least groaned tiredly by now in response to James waking him. He saw a plant vase on the nightstand by Sirius’s bed and took out the pretty rose that his mum had placed into it, sat it on the counter and dumped the water onto Sirius’s face, and Sirius shot up like a bullet with wide eyes.

Sirius sputtered water out of his mouth, “Prongs what was that for!?”

James was already heading out of Sirius’s room, “We’ve got a lot to do around here mate before Lil-the girls get here. Why were you so hard to wake up? You shouldn’t have been more tired than usual because we went to bed at 8:00 last night.”

Sirius rubbed his hands over his face, “I uh cast a sleeping spell on me after the- nightmare, I didn’t want to keep waking you up since I knew you wouldn’t want to look worse than you usually do for Evans.” Sirius looked like he was trying to be cheeky but was too tired for the look to effectively come across as cheeky.

James’s eyes softened, “Padfoot, you didn’t have to do that, I don’t mind talking to you when you have those dreams. But I am glad you got some sleep, maybe you could cast one every night so that you can get more sleep?”

Sirius hopped out of bed and went to his dresser to pull out some pajamas and a t-shirt. “Yeah, that’ll be good for the school year.”

James watched Sirius solemnly. No one should go through what Sirius has been through, but especially because he is James’s best friend, this situation enraged him to no end. Wanting to move forward, James spoke up, “How much you want to bet Moony’s already up, reading a book?”

Sirius smiled as he pulled on a light grey t-shirt, with his black pajama pants. Sirius tended to wear some sort of ensemble that consisted of darker colors, mainly black and grey. James wondered if he was going through an existential crisis since moving in with him. Whatever it was, James knew he needed to be there for Sirius and support him. Sirius finally spoke up, “I bet you 2 galleons that not only is Remus awake reading a book, but I bet he has a coffee mug set on his dresser that’s already cold.”

James smiled, “You’re on.” The boys shook hands then walked out of Sirius’s room to the room to the left of Sirius’s not even bothering to knock because they knew Remus would be awake, even if he was not reading. It was a week before the full moon, so Remus often went to bed extremely early, so in turn, he woke up earlier than all the other Marauders.

Sure enough, Remus was propped up on some pillows, reading the collective works of Shakespeare that he had been reading since the end of the school year. He had a coffee mug sat on his nightstand, and Sirius quickly stepped towards it to feel its warmth, only to find the warmth was absent, and the coffee was cold from sitting out all morning while Remus reading. Sirius proudly turned towards James, “You owe me two galleons Prongsie.”

James rolled his eyes, “Yeah, yeah, I’ll give them to you later. How’d you sleep Moony?”

Remus softly sat his book beside him, and grabbed his coffee mug, and took a slow slip then answered, “Pretty well, a little restless, being close to the time, you know, but overall, well. What about you and Padfoot?”

Sirius looked down at the floor, as he quietly said, “I slept decently.”  
James spoke up and said, “I sleep alright. So, we have a lot to do today to get ready for the girls to get here. The first order of business is eating breakfast, and since mum and dad leave super early the house-elves probably have breakfast ready.” James looked at the clock on Remus's nightstand. “GUYS it's 7:01 we need to eat, let's go! Mum and Dad are probably still here, so we can tell them bye before they leave.”

James walked briskly out of the room, with Sirius and Remus trailing behind him. He walked into the kitchen and saw his mum and dad sitting at the table holding hands while eating a hearty breakfast of eggs, bacon, and two pancakes on each of their plates. The boys happily sat down next to each other across from James’s parents, at the kitchen table. James' favorite house-elf, Ceesy, sat a plate filled with delicious breakfast food in front of each boy. The elf smiled brightly at James after she sat down his plate, and James smiled brightly, “Thanks Ceesy! How did you sleep?”

Ceesy smiled brightly, “Ceesy slept good Mr. Potter, how did Mr. Potter sleep?” James rolled his eyes, “Ceesy, please call me James.”

Ceesy’s pretty grass green oversized doe eyes blinked, and she smiled toothily, “Yes, Mr. – James. Is James’s girlfriend visiting today?”

James blushed as he heard Remus and Sirius stifling snickers. James ran a hand through his hair, “Ceesy, she’s not my girlfriend, she is just, an acquaintance I guess.”

Ceesy smiled, “But Mr. Potter wants the girl to be his girlfriend?”

Sirius barked out a loud laugh, as Euphemia and Fleamont tried but failed at silencing their own laughs. Even Remus seemed to be greatly amused. “Where’d you hear that Ceesy?”

Ceesy looked down at the ground and nervously moved her foot. “Mr. Sirius told me, Mr. James.”

James looked at Sirius whose eyes were closed as he laughed into his hand leaning over his breakfast. “Ceesy, did you know that Sirius loves Marlene?”  
Ceesy smiled brightly, “Oh, Ceesy is glad Mr. Sirius has found love.” Ceesy clapped her hands together delightedly, as she looked at Sirius with giddy eyes.

Sirius was blushing as he said, “Oi! I never said I love her because I don’t.”

James rolled his eyes, “Thanks for breakfast Ceesy.” James was about to ask Ceesy about cooking lunch for the girls as Ceesy turned to head back to the kitchen, but his mother interrupted,

Euphemia smiled brightly at the boys, “Did you boys finally get a good night’s rest?”

Sirius who was now stuffing his mouth with a fluffy light tan pancake, said through a mouthful, “Better than I have in weeks!”

Remus smiled lightly towards Euphemia, “I slept well, and the coffee was a good wake-up call this morning.”

Euphemia smiled, “I thought you would like that Remus, I made sure Ceesy brewed enough for all you boys. I suspected James would wake you all early this morning.” Euphemia looked at James with a sly sparkle in her chocolate brown eyes.

James blushed as he looked down at his plate contained a half-eaten pancake, and one strip of bacon, with the eggs already absent from his plate because, well of course he ate his eggs first, he has loved eggs since he was a child.

Sirius laughed at Euphemia’s comment, “Oh, Mama Mia, you have no idea, James made us go to bed at 8 o clock last night to get ready for Evans. I mean, if this goes well, this could be like the first time you and Monty meet your future daughter-in-law!” Sirius said this with a humorous side glance towards James. James' eyes widen as if willing Sirius to shut up, Sirius smile grew wider along with James' eyes.

James turned towards his mum, “Mum, you don’t need to meet Lily, I mean, we aren’t even friends it doesn’t matter.”

Fleamont spoke up next, “Whether you and the girl get married, I’d like to meet the girl my son has talked about since he was 11 years old.”

Sirius barked out a laugh, “Remember the first thing he told you about Evans?”

Remus snorted loudly, and James turned to glare at him as he stated, “I don’t know what you’re talking about Padfoot.”

Euphemia smiled brightly, “Oh, I remember what you said Jamesie”

Fleamont put his arm around the back of Euphemia’s chair as he said, “What was it, he said Sirius?” However, his tone made it seem as though he already knew.

Sirius put his hand over his heart and put on dramatic lovesick puppy dog eyes as he changed the pitch in his voice to a high falsetto that was meant to resemble 11-year-old James’s voice. “Dad, I need you to teach me how to flirt- “At this last part Remus joined in saying this, but not in the same falsetto as Sirius, “so I need pick-up lines for muggleborns!” Sirius and Remus each had their eyes closed laughing out loudly, Sirius banging his fist on the breakfast table. Fleamont was leaning back in his chair laughing. Euphemia was laughing lightly staring at her son with compassion as she knew she was the reason Sirius and Remus knew such information about her son.

James blushed, and loudly exclaimed, “How did you even know that Padfoot? That was private between me and my dad!” James punched Sirius in the arm, but it did no good. Everyone at the table laughed loudly as Sirius high-fived Euphemia. James turned to his mom with a distinct look of betrayal, while Sirius was still guffawing loudly.

Sirius spoke up, “The funniest part of that, little did James know that any sort of pick-up line would get him hexed! She didn’t care AT ALL if it was specific to muggleborns.” Remus suddenly whispered to Sirius. Sirius then turned towards James with a mischievous smile on his face, as he laughed, “Remember when he asked her out the first time in 3rd year? He sent her a howler- “Sirius paused to look down at his plate as he laughed suddenly harder at the memory.

Remus spoke up, “He recited a poem he wrote on a howler, and she hexed him every time she saw him that day! Even in class behind the professor’s backs!” Sirius and Remus were laughing infinitely louder, as his parents laughed lightly along.

Fleamont looked at his son, with a mischievous glint in his hazel eyes, that was identical to James' mischievous glint when he would plan pranks. “James, I don’t remember the advice I gave you, but I am positive it was not to put a poem in a howler.”

Everyone at the table laughed, as James blushed deep scarlet and put his head in his hands, thinking of the howler memory. Only, that was not the first time he asked Lily out. He asked her out a few weeks before that incident when she was alone in the library. She had said no then as well, which is why James didn’t tell The Marauders because he expected her to say yes on the spot. When she hadn’t, not only was he sad, but he didn’t need their jokes stabbing at his ego any more than her rejection did. He remembered when he walked into the library looking for a book he needed on Animagi, at the time the boys hadn’t a clue how to master being animagi, so they each decided to read different books on it before actually attempting the magic. She was sitting at a corner table, and James was surprised that Snape hadn’t been sitting oddly close to her like he normally did when Snape and Lily were together. James looked around and didn’t see Snape anywhere in the library, so he turned to look at her for a second from the doorway. He saw the way her red hair was tucked behind her ear as she read a book. James thinks he remembers it being her potions textbook, but he is not sure as this wasn’t the most important part of the memory. James suddenly got the urge to ask her to the upcoming Hogsmeade weekend, as he suspected she would get a lot of offers, he knew he should ask sooner rather than later. He remembered his palms getting sweaty, and his heart raced incredibly fast, something he wasn’t used to feeling. He had considered asking her for a few weeks but hadn’t put much thought into how to ask her, but more thought into the actual date. He slowly walked over to stand over Lily’s table, he remembered being confused by his nerves, because, of course, she would say yes. Why wouldn’t she?

James winced inwardly as he remembered his arrogance. He remembered that he stopped by Lily, and Lily didn’t even turn her head to him as he stood by her. He had nervously run a hand through his hair as he thought of something to say. He cleared his throat, and with a posh accent said, “Alright Evans?”  
He remembered Lily’s glorious green eyes lifting to glare at him for a short second, and she sighed and lowered her eyes to continue reading her book.

“I was until you showed up”

He ran a hand through his hair again, as he had put on a smile to fake confidence. “You wound me Evans, but uh, I was wondering if-“He paused noticing that she was not listening as she was rummaging in her bag for something. “Uh, Evans?”

Lily had slowly turned around, and James could tell she was annoyed, “Potter?”  
“I was just wondering, if you a fine girl such as yourself, would like to accompany me to the upcoming Hogsmeade weekend?”

Lily had just turned back to rummaging in her bag.

“Evans?”

Lily quickly turned around, so fast that James had taken a step back away from her, “What Potter?”

James' nerves were getting the better of him, ‘I’m trying to ask you something!” He had run a hand through his hair.

Lily rolled her eyes, “Don’t you have some brooms to fly or something?”

“Evans. Go to Hogsmeade with me.”

Lily gaped at him for a second, then she hotly said, “That’s not asking!”

“Okay, Evans, will you go to Hogsmeade with me?”

“No.”

“Oh, come on! Why not? We are both good looking, smart, and I like you, come on, what’s the harm?”

Lily’s eyes scanned over his face, as her face and neck were getting red, something James would later learn was a sign that she was getting extremely angry. “The harm is that I don’t like you, not as a person, not as a classmate, and certainly not as someone I would date.”  
  


“Oh, come off it, Evans! You like me! Admit it, don’t you at least think I’m attractive?”  
Lily answered a little too quickly for James’s liking, “No, in fact, I don’t, as much as you’d like to think every girl desires you, you just have too many disgusting qualities that ruin any appeal your looks might have brought. So, no, I do not find you the least bit attractive.” James wondered if she had considered this before because of the speed at which she answered him.  
  


James remembered looking down at the floor, as he quietly said, “Oh.” James refused to come off as hurt by the girl that made his stomach flop happily. “Whatever Evans, one day you’ll fall for me, you just wait!” He remembered flashing her a winning smile, that he knew did not meet his eyes. He remembered desperately hoping that what he had stated would end up being true. He remembered writing the poem that he put into the howler, and he knew he only continued the streak of asking in huge gestures because it was easier to conceal his hurt if there was something to laugh at in the midst of the rejection. Something to take the edge off until he could deal with it on his own, instead of having to deal with it in front of her like he had the first time he had asked her.

James was brought of his reverie by his father’s voice, “Ah, Mia, we’ve got to get going.” Fleamont stood from his chair, as Euphemia grabbed both of their plates and stacked them one atop another, and placed them in the middle of the table for the house elves to pick up. After Fleamont clapped Remus on the back and hugged James and Sirius, he walked towards the Potter’s front door. Euphemia kissed each boy on the cheek, and a hug and told James, and Sirius that she loved them, and walked towards the front door the same way Fleamont had.

James suddenly stood up, “Okay, enough eating, we need to clean each bathroom, each of our bedrooms, the backyard, the kitchen, and basically every part of the house.” James remembered that he had left the list of chores in his room and turned to speed walk back towards his room.

Sirius spoke up as James was walking towards his room, “Do you actually expect Lily to be in your room Prongs? Because I’m willing to make a bet over that.”

Remus spoke up next, “Padfoot, can it, we know you’ll try to get Marlene in your room, and we both know you don’t want her to see your room in its current state.”  
Sirius snorted indignantly, “I’m not going to try to get her in my room, I told you its different with her, we are just friends.”

Remus rolled his eyes, “You are going on a date the day we are going to Diagon alley to get our books!”

Sirius was the one who rolled his eyes, “So? We haven’t gone on it yet, so we are friends.”

James rolled his eyes and continued his walk to his room to get the list of chores. He ignored his friend’s banter. He deeply hopes Lily likes his friends.

**Well, I know she at least likes Remus. So, it shouldn’t be hard for her to like Sirius and Peter, right?**

James continued to his room to get the list so he could direct Sirius and Remus on what to clean, and how to clean it.

It is now 11:47, and James, Sirius, and Remus were standing in the kitchen, James had the parchment that held the list of chores in his hand. “Okay, so we did, each bedroom, each bathroom, Remus did you clean the library?”

“Yeah, it was surprisingly already pretty clean.”

“Yeah, my dad cleans it weekly so when he has people from the ministry over for meetings it looks nice. Sirius, did you clean the living room?”  
Sirius groaned, “Ughhhh, James why didn’t you just ask the house elves to clean that’s what they are for!”

James gave Sirius a hard look, and stated, “Sirius, we are literally using magic, it’s the same thing as what the house-elves would do, besides the house-elves are- BLOODY HELL!”

James slammed the paper on the table, as Sirius bewilderedly said, “Prongs what’s going on?”  
  


“I forgot to tell the house elves to cook for lunch!”

Sirius barked out a laugh at James expense, as Remus put a hand on Sirius shoulder shaking his head with a small smirk as if to say, “Stop laughing, even though it’s obviously somewhat funny”

James rushed into the room where the house-elves were bustling over deserts, various side dishes, and what the Potter’s had requested for dinner, a Rotisserie Chicken. James felt awful for asking them to make something, he glanced at his watch, at 11:52. So basically there were 8 minutes to prepare a meal for five hungry teenagers, assuming the girls got here around 12.

**Great.**

Ceesy walked up to James as he stood in the doorway of the kitchen. “What can Ceesy do for Mr. James?”  
  


James really felt awful for springing this on the elves last minute, “Do you have anything left over that I could serve for lunch? I know you made something for me and the guys, but is there something that could feed two more people?”

Ceesy thought for a second, “We made you and Mr. Sirius, and Mr. Remus some French Onion soup! We made enough to have some leftovers because we know Mr. Potter’s favorite soup is French Onion, but Ceesy would love for Mr. James to use the French Onion soup!”

James let out a breath he’d been holding, “Thank you Ceesy! Seriously, you are the best! I owe you!”

Ceesy smiled at him brightly, “Anything to help Mr. James. We will set the French onion soup on the dining table for Mr. James and his friends.”

James leaned down to hug Ceesy and felt Ceesy’s bat-like ear poke into his lower abdomen. He felt her tiny hands lightly squeeze around his back after a second, and smiled, “Thank you Ceesy. You are a lifesaver!”

James let go of Ceesy and scurried out of the kitchen. Once he entered the kitchen again, he clapped his hands together in a business-like manner. Remus and Sirius were still standing by the kitchen table. “Okay, the house-elves are putting together some French Onion soup for lunch, and I’m going run-up to my room and get some dessert to set with him. The girls should be here soon, so we need to go change clothes.”

James started to walk briskly past the boys as Remus’s voice made him pause and face towards him, “What desert do you keep in your room?”

Sirius answered next before James could, “Chocolate Frogs, right?”

James nodded and then turned to keep walking. He heard Sirius say under his breath, “Should’ve bet on it.” James rolled his eyes, as he heard Remus and Sirius shuffling their chairs so that they could change out of their pajamas.

James knew that chocolate frogs would be a weird thing to set next to French onion soup, but he also knew that Chocolate Frogs were one of, if not Lily’s exact favorite wizarding candy, and he wanted to make sure she was pleased with the meal since eating would be the first thing they did when the girls arrived.

He walked up to his room and looked in the mirror. He really needed to shower, but he ran out of time because he had to go talk to the house-elves. He checked his watch and saw the time, 11:58 a.m. Since he was not sure exactly what time the girls would be here, he didn’t want to get in the shower and miss any moment that he would get to spend with Lily. So, he grabbed his wand which was tucked in the elastic of his pajama pants and took off his pajama bottoms, and then he threw off his father’s grey t-shirt that he normally would wear if he was cleaning, leaving him in his boxers. He said a “Scourgify!” and sloppily ran the soap suds across his chest, under his armpits, and through his hair. Then he did a quick “Aquamenti” To rinse the suds off, and then performed a Hot-Air charm to dry off his body and boxers. He started his habit of only changing out of his boxers when he was in the bathroom, as Sirius would often barge in his room without knocking if he needed something. Once his body was completely dry, he found some black muggle sports shorts, that had a gold stripe down the side which his dad had brought him after a particularly long mission he had gone on. He then threw on a black t-shirt, that contained a golden snitch on it, with the shorts that he was wearing, and hoped that maybe this ensemble would make Lily comfortable to be around him if he was dressed slightly like a muggle. He ran a hand through his hair that was mostly dry but still had a touch of wetness to it, as he checked his watch. He saw that his watch read the time 12: 13 p.m., and he rushed out of his room, only to rush right back in and grab 5 chocolate frogs from his bedside table and ran out of his bedroom. He learned to keep chocolate by his bedside at Hogwarts, so he could easily grab them and give them to Remus if he were feeling antsy a few days before the full moon. He was glad to use them for something good today, as opposed to using them to spite a nearing full moon.

He ran to the kitchen and saw five bowls of soup laid out on the table, and he sighed gratefully.

**I will need to get Ceesy a gift of some sort, she’s a lifesaver.**

He sat one chocolate frog next to each bowl of soup and then walked towards the front door. Remus was sitting on the Potter’s, chocolate-colored sofa in the living room, reading his Collective work of Shakespeare again, while Sirius was looking out of a window that looked out to the Potter’s front yard. James checked his watch which read 12:16 p.m. now, and he suddenly felt his stomach do a flop. He couldn’t believe Lily Evans would be at his house. He ran a hand through his hair.

“Guys what if Lily decided not to come?”

Sirius rolled his eyes and continued looking out the window, as Remus showed up by him, and put his hand on James’s shoulder to stop the pacing that he was unaware he was doing. Remus spoke up soothingly, “James, she’s coming. Just calm down and try to get to know her. Try to be her friend first, and not her husband.”

James heard Sirius snort at this, and James turned to glare at him. Before James could retort to Sirius, he heard Sirius loudly and enthusiastically states, “THEY’RE HERE!” James hearted thudding around in his chest frantically, as Sirius threw the door open, and started walking towards Lily and Marlene. James walked towards the front door, and his heart jumped suddenly.

**She changed her hair. Bloody Hell.**

James stood in the door as Remus walked up behind James about to walk through the door himself. James breathed out deeply, “Moony, she changed her hair, she has bangs!”

Remus gave James an amused look, “Yes, I can see that James.”

James ran a hand through his hair, and exasperatedly said, “Just when I thought I might be able to calm down my nerves, she goes and changes her hair. And of course, she looks bloody amazing!” James slightly gestured towards Lily with an overwhelmed expression on his face.

Remus laughed lightly, “Calm down James, she looks just as pretty as she normally does, just treat her how you normally do- no wait, don’t do that, treat her like a normal person, and not as an idiot would treat her.” Remus turned to James with laughter shining in his amber-colored eyes.

James ran a hand through his hair, as Remus walked out to greet the girls, James quietly mumbled loud enough for Remus to hear as he walked away, “Ha Ha Bloody Ha, You’re hilarious Moony”

Remus did not grace James with a response, but James knew Remus had a small humorful smirk on his face.

**I have to stay back here, there is no way I can contain myself if I don’t gather my thoughts. Merlin, she’s so pretty. Ugh, her shorts, there should be a wizarding decree that makes whatever kind of shorts those are a part of the Hogwarts uniform. Wait, they are walking towards me, okay, calm.**

James decided that he should at least step outside from the front door, so he took three steps and shut the door behind him. He ran a hand through his hair as he stood awkwardly outside the front door. He watched Lily talk with Sirius and Remus until Marlene addressed him happily.

“James! How are you? It must’ve been hard to keep this one under control!” She giggled as she pointed at Sirius.

James laughed lightly, happy to see Marlene but still nervous about being in the redheads’ presence, “It’s been a good summer Marls! Not too much going on, um, the house-elves made lunch if anyone is hungry.”

James walked back to the front door and held it open as Sirius and Marlene piled in, then Remus, and then Lily.

**Okay, calm down James, don’t ask her out, she’s obviously going to say no, so it’s no use. Just get to know her! Right, get to know her. Man, I can’t believe I’ll get to learn new things about Lily Evans, what a bloody dream this is. Her bangs look so good on her.**

James' heart was thudding as Lily crossed into his house, for the first time. He knew he was just being sentimental, but he could not help it. Lily Evans was at his house, and he would get to spend time with her.

She gave a curt “Thank you” to James as she walked past the door. James not wanting to mess up and say something to piss her off right off the bat just nodded to her in acknowledgment. He noticed that Lily’s eyes looked him up and down, and he flew his gaze to the floor. He willed himself not to freak out. She has never looked him up and down, he wondered if maybe it was an accident or if she was not actually looking at him, because as she has stated many times, she did not find him attractive. James remembered that he wore some muggle clothing and realized that Lily was probably just wondering where he got it. He suddenly felt very subconscious of whether he looked as good as she did because he was not sure if muggle clothes would make him look attractive, or if they would have an opposite effect and make him look out of place. To make her not look at him too long in case he did look out of place in muggle clothing, he decided to just walk to the kitchen away from the girl who made his heart thud rapidly.

James notices that Sirius and Marlene were sitting next to one another, Moony was by Sirius, and there were two more seats. James did not want to make it seem like he had manipulated the situation to where Lily would have to sit by him, so he left her an open seat to where she could sit by Remus. Then he scooted his chair about a foot away from the one he knew Lily would have to sit at, just so she could know he had not intentionally planned this seating arrangement. He wanted her to feel comfortable after all if he wanted her to talk to him. James' mind was racing as he waited for Lily to come into the kitchen. It seemed like hours, but deep down he knew it had to be around 30 seconds. Soon, James saw Lily walk into the kitchen and pause for a second and then have a small look of surprise as she made her way over to her seat awkwardly. James' heart was pounding, and he saw Lily slightly wide-eyed looking at the meal, and he hoped it was a good sign. Then he noticed Lily start looking around as if uncomfortable at everyone sitting at the table, and then she looked at him. He had been staring at her, he knew this, but he could not draw his eyes away. Her hair, was just so, ugh his stomach flipped, and her eyes, it felt as if she were staring straight at him, and he could not help rapid fluttering of his heart. Suddenly Lily’s eyebrows scrunched questioningly, and then it registered that she knew he was staring, and he abruptly looked down at his soup, feeling heat rush to his face in embarrassment.

James continued looking at his soup as his thoughts drifted. He really hoped Lily would have a good time, even if that meant he was not allowed to talk. However, he really wanted to make progress in their relationship, even if it was just to be better acquaintances, or on the verge of friendship. He desperately wanted to know Lily better and to have her know more about him. He suddenly remembered that he had people in his kitchen, who were now animatedly talking. Of course, he would zone out by thinking of Lily. He rarely zoned out, but when he did it was always Lily, and maybe a few times because of the Marauders. He heard Lily confidently state, “Flitwick of course, Slughorn is amazing at Potions, but that’s not the most helpful thing in a duel, Flitwick’s charms are faster to apply in a duel, and I don’t see Sluggy being the type of wizard to hold a fight long, I see him hiding somewhere or randomly fleeing.”

James wondered what the discussion was about. He realized that they must be talking about which professor would win in a duel, something the Marauders often discussed. The Marauders also often discussed battles of different magical creatures, and these sorts of topics had brought on some of the most heated discussions to happen in the Hogwarts boy’s dormitory.

Marlene looked at Sirius smugly, and James guessed that Lily had said what Marlene had wanted. As a way to de-bunk Lily’s statement, Sirius stated, “Well, what if Sluggy took liquid luck right before the duel, then, of course, he’d win against Flitwick.”

Remus spoke up next, “Of course if he knew the duel was happening, he could do that, but that has nothing to do with his own skill, and how he duels other people when he’s not prepared.”

James was used to Sirius bringing up Liquid Luck, as he often used that defense in their discussions back at Hogwarts, but James knew this wasn’t always an applicable solution to dueling, so he spoke up,

“You both make good points, hypothetically, say one side of a battle knew when they would be dueling, everyone on that side could take liquid luck and be successful, but if they are ambushed, then, of course, it comes down to skill, which is more important to have, in the off chance the attack is a surprise.”

Marlene spoke up next, “Okay, let’s assume that Slughorn and Flitwick have some beef of some sort, maybe they both want to date McGonagall, I don’t know...”

James was prepared for what he knew Sirius would say, and the smirk slowly glided on James’s face as Sirius spoke, “Sluggy and Flitwick can stand aside, Minnie is mine.” Then Sirius looked around at Remus and James who looked at him for a second, and each boy busted out in loud laughter. The joking about Sirius liking McGonagall started in their 4th year when Sirius had attempted to flirt his way out of detention with the stern Professor. McGonagall had been so shocked and surprised, that she had to think for a few minutes to gather her wits, and then gave Sirius an extra day of detention, and had taken away ten points from Gryffindor. James remembered laughing for what felt like an infinite amount of time, and he smiled remembering Sirius’s obviously fake and playful wink towards the flabbergasted professor.

Marlene rolled her eyes, “Okay fine, Slughorn and Flitwick both know the duel is coming, but solely based on skill who would win? No liquid luck or anything involved.”

Lily spoke up next, “I stand by my previous statement, Flitwick would win.”

James admired Lily’s stubbornness and confidence. He found her to be extraordinarily strong-willed, and it was one of the first qualities of hers that made him like her beyond her pretty looks.

James had to concur, logically Lily made a good point. “I have to agree with Lily, I think Sluggy would just try to flee or something, or-“ James paused to laugh somewhat with a small smile on his face as he thought of something Slughorn would obviously do, “ invite Flitwick to his slug club parties as a peace offering.”

Lily snorted at James’s comment, James' eyes widened, and his gaze snapped to her. He had just made Lily Evans laugh, technically snort, but he was definitely counting that as a laugh. This is the first time Lily Evans laughed because of something he said, and he had to revel in it, but all too soon, Lily looked to her bowl of soup, and James realized his gaze must have made her uncomfortable.

Thankfully, Sirius ignored the tension as he continued, “I don’t know, I mean Sluggy would just need to stun Flitwick because he’s so small he’d fly a hundred feet in the air!”

Marlene playfully slapped Sirius’s arm, “Flitwick is a great wizard though!”

Sirius looked playfully at Marlene for a second then returned to his serious expression, “But if he gets thrown across the room, it won’t matter he’d probably be injured!”

James was impressed by how much Lily seemed to be engaging the group as she stated, “The real question is who would win between Dumbledore and McGonagall?”

Lily wiggled her eyebrows in Marlene’s direction, who chorused a low “oOoOo” as Marlene turned towards Sirius. James thought she looked quite adorable when she wiggled her eyebrows that way, and he hoped that was a quirk she did often.

Sirius spoke first in response, “I might be biased, but I think Minnie, I think if she wanted to, she could do some real damage.”

James agreed that Minnie could definitely do major damage, but something about the Headmaster made James suspect he would win. So, he spoke next, “Sure, but Dumbledore seems to know anything and everything before anyone else, he’d anticipate McGonagall’s moves before she even makes them.”

Lily turned towards James as she said, “But McGonagall is an Animagus, surely would be cunning enough to do unpredictably strong spells, I mean the amount of skill it takes to become an Animagus, McGonagall’s probably one of the best wizards at Hogwarts.” James' heart sped up, but this time not because Lily was looking at him, but because she was talking about Animagi, a topic that Lily could not have been aware of was a personal topic for the three boys. James glanced back and forth between Remus and Sirius who were also glancing back and forth between each other. They were trying to think of who should speak up next, and what should be said when they speak up. Suddenly Remus spoke up, “Who wants to go play quidditch?”

James welcomed the distraction, and also genuinely wanted to play quidditch. He was the first to jump up, “I think there are enough brooms for everyone to fly, since there are five of us we could do two on three?”

Sirius spoke up excitedly, “I call Marlene being on my team!”

James thought pensively for a second, “Yeah that’ll work, and then Me, Remus, and Lily can be the team of three?”

**YES, Thank you, Padfoot! Being on a quidditch team with Lily Evans would be a bloody dream.**

James' stomach butterflied were fluttering violently as He looked towards Remus and Lily for confirmation, and Lily vigorously shook her head, “No, no way.” James' stomach suddenly stopped.   
**What?**

Marlene laughed, “Oh yeah, Lily claims to have a deathly fear of heights, she hasn’t flown a broom since the lesson in first year.” Marlene looked at Lily with humor in her eyes.

James was shocked, and he knew his face conveyed this, “What? How could you not have flown since first year?”

Lily felt self-conscious as everyone in the circle seemed flabbergasted by Marlene’s claim. “I just don’t like flying; it doesn’t come naturally to me like it seemingly does everyone else.”

Remus put his hand on Lily’s shoulder comfortingly, “Don’t worry Lily you don’t have to fly if you don’t want to.”

James felt betrayed by Remus so he bluntly spoke up, “No, she’s got to at least try again, and we can all teach her how to fly.”

Honestly, James could not believe this. The lesson in first year was the basic flying theory, nothing exhilarating, and no one got to experience any real height or see any beautiful views from the sky. He knew if Lily would just try it for real, past simple basic flying theory, then she would love it.

Lily looked at Potter testily, “And what if I don’t want to be taught how to fly Potter?”

Sirius and Marlene looked at each other worriedly, scared that the last hours’ worth of civility would go down the drain.

Lily was still sitting in her chair with her arms crossed over her chest, as James began getting flustered and nervous that he had made the redhead mad at him. He ran a hand through his hair, and then put both hands on his hip as he matter-of-factly stated, “Then you’ll be missing out on something really amazing, Evans.”

There was a pause as Lily looked at James shocked by his revelation, and Sirius and Marlene got up to go outside. Sirius felt uncomfortable in the room, so as he walked outside, he said, “Marls and I will get the brooms ready, we’ll get five brooms in case Evans changes her mind.”

Remus got up uncomfortably as well, “Lily if you don’t want to fly you don’t have to, but James is right, you’ll be missing out.” Then he swiftly slid through the sliding glass door that led to the Potter’s humungous backyard.

**Thank you Moony!**

Lily was still sitting in her seat with her arms closed over her chest looking at her still half-eaten French onion soup, with an annoyed grimace on her face. James was pacing and running his hand rapidly through his hair and alternating between looking at Lily and the ground. He did not know how to articulate what he wanted, and he was not even sure he had completely thought through what kind of relationship he wanted with Lily. He always expected a romantic relationship, and now this option was out of the question, he guessed that he could try just platonic friendship.

**It’s better than nothing. Besides, I can’t get to truly know her if she vehemently hates me.**

James’s mind was racing as he let some words stumble out of his mouth, “Evans, I don’t like this, I don’t like how bad of terms we are on. I don’t like that I am always making you mad.” James tugged anxiously at his curly locks and pushed his glasses up his nose which had fallen down his face while he was pacing back and forth.

Lily was confused and somewhat annoyed by James' statement as James could tell by her facial expression, “Okay? What do you want me to do about it?”

James felt exasperated, and he wished he were able to more effectively articulate his feelings to Lily, “Lily, can we just, start over, can I call you Lily, and you call me James? Can we just be civil to each other?”

**Yeah, I think that could be effective.**

Lily tossed his words around in his brain, “Do you mean, be like, friends?”

**Yes! Finally, she gets it.**

James was incredibly happy, and he felt a wide smile spread across his features, “Yeah, like friends.”

“I don’t know James- “

James was so close to making the progress he so desperately desired in his relationship with Lily. “See! We’re already doing it, you called me James!”

Lily breathed out deeply as she uncrossed her arms, “Let me think it over for a little bit, okay? There’s a lot I have to consider.”

James felt his elation climb down a little at this, but he knew this was better than a strict “no.” He spoke up hoping he could at least help her have a good time while at his house, even friendship did not come out of it. So, he hopefully asked, “Will you at least let me and the guys teach you how to fly? We won’t let you fall, and we are quite experienced.” James said this with a small cheeky smile, as Lily glared at him thinking over her options. James saw Lily’s eyes deepen in concentration as she glared at him as if considering her options if she did not learn to fly today. James' breathing was hitched as he waited.

“Fine, I will learn how to fly, but the second I say I want off the broom, I’m getting off!”

James held his hands up in surrender, with a goofy crooked smile on his face. He felt pure joy at Lily’s response and he almost wanted to laugh at himself for being so ridiculous. “Of course, Lily, whatever you want.” He then walked towards the sliding glass door and opened it, gesturing for Lily to walk through it first. Lily looked at him skeptically, trying to make sure that he knew no funny business would be tolerated. James' heart thudded violently in his chest as she looked at him as if warning him not to do anything stupid. She looked deep into his giddy hazel eyes with her calculating, glaring green eyes as she walked in front of him out into the back yard. He watched as her eyes scanned over the different sections of his yard. He knew his backyard was impressive, but he forgets how shocked new visitors are by his house until they see the view that he sees daily, Therefore, he is not as surprised by the elegance of his backyard as his guests normally are. However, he could never take for granted the fact that Lily Evans was the one surprised by his houses’ elegance now. He viewed Lily with as much wonder and dazzlement as she seemingly viewed his backyard, and as James realized this, he realized how pathetic this sounded. For the second time in his life, he considered that maybe he loved Lily Evans, but he pushed that thought away because he knew he could not love someone he knew almost nothing about. James cannot love someone who has not even stated that they wanted to be his friend. Sure, Lily was smart, and he knew she was somewhat witty, stubborn, beautiful. But as far as actually understanding and knowing Lily Evans deeply, well, he knew he did not, despite how much he wanted to. Hopefully, this visit would help him discern his feelings, and that even if Lily never loved him romantically, maybe he could gain another good friend from this. James was currently standing behind Lily, watching her eyes still shift over his backyard, and was dazzled by how pretty she could make any emotion. He was giddy that Lily Evans would even consider being his friend. Even with Lily looking at his backyard with wonder, he knew he was the awestruck one, really.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaahhh thank you for reading!! I have the 6th chapter already on Fanfiction.net, but I kinda hate it so I might just erase it and start over, or maybe post it and get feedback then decide. Please review or message me if you have questions!! Again, thank you for reading!  
> Love,  
> Mac


End file.
